


One Mistake and It All Comes Crashing Down

by MinteaOwO



Category: Dangan Ronpa, Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fluff and Angst, Kamukura actually has emotions in this guys, M/M, Mind Manipulation, Past Brainwashing, Past Child Abuse, Past Torture, Servant Komaeda, Slow Build, Ya know the usual stuff, despair disease, unhealthy relationships (past)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-14
Updated: 2017-09-01
Packaged: 2018-08-22 08:10:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 27,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8278940
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MinteaOwO/pseuds/MinteaOwO
Summary: 'When Kamukura opened his eyes, he immediately knew that his plan had failed. Not just because the green light and concrete ceiling were now replaced with bright floodlights, but because he wasn't supposed to have opened his eyes at all.'(A what-if scenario where Hinata murders someone during Chapter 2, and causes Kamukura to take his place in the killing game.)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! So yes even though I have another story going at the moment, this was an idea that I've had for a while. Just recently (as in today) I started writing it out, and well I just couldn't stop! I already have the first 2 chapters done, so think of it is a treat to anyone who was also waiting for my other story to update!
> 
> Also this is probably pretty obvious but, major spoilers for sdr2, dr:ae, and dr3 are ahead!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDIT 8/30/17: So over the next couple days I'm going to be going back through the fic and trying to clean it up, but don't worry nothing really major is going to change. I just noticed few gramatical/spelling errors. However I did need to add a whole new section to this first chapter, which explains what led Hinata to kill Souda.

_“You could do it you know. You of all people would be able to pull it off.”_

Hinata stared up at the ceiling of his cottage, exhausted from the long day he just had. He turned his head to the side and looked out his window at the night sky that shimmered and sparkled with stars. He should be asleep. He wanted to be asleep. But unfortunately the voice chittering away inside of his head had other ideas.

_“Come on Hinata, it wouldn't take much at all to pull it off!”_

Hinata groaned and twisted over to his other side, staring intently at the white wall next to him. God why did the voice always show up at night? Actually, why did it have to show up at all?

Ever since the first trial, night after night Hinata was plagued by the invasive voice who was always trying to convince him to kill one of his classmates. Was this some kind of motive created by Monokuma? Did anyone else hear a similar voice? A wave of fear suddenly rushed through him . No one else would actually listen to what the voice was saying right? Surely not, especially after seeing what failure resulted in.

Wait, no. Hinata shook his head. They wouldn't kill anyone else because they just _shouldn't_ kill anyone, not because of the consequences!

Hinata brushed a stray lock of hair back into place. He had get some sleep and not let this voice get to him. For his and his classmates’ sake.

~*~

A few more days had passed and the voice had begun to plague his days as well. Hinata had tried to bring it up to the others, desperate to see if they too were hearing it. They all just shook their head or gave him a weird look. Nanami at least tried to comfort him by saying that it was probably just stress from what happened at the first trial. He had just sighed and agreed knowing that continuing to push it probably wouldn't benefit him, and worst case scenario, get him locked up with Komaeda. Something that Hinata really didn't want to happen.

One morning was especially bad since not only had the voice kept him up, but Nanami had also dragged him out to play the actual motive Monokuma had set up. Hinata’s head hurt from the lack of sleep and he wanted nothing more than for the voice to just shut up. Honestly at that point if it took killing someone to shut it up, Hinata would be willing to do it in a heartbeat.

Of course it didn't help that the voice kept talking about how easy it would be to use the real motive as a coverup. To kill someone the same way one of the girls in the game had died. It made his stomach turn at just how detailed the voice’s plan actually was, so when Souda asked if he would want to spend the day at the beach with him Hinata was more than happy to accept.

~*~

Hinata's fingers trembled as the metal bat clattered to the ground. The dull thunk, echoed off the beach house walls as he stared down at the the slumped over form before him. Souda, pink hair now stained a dark and ugly red from the wound the he inflicted. Something that he, Hinata Hajime, had sworn time and time again would never happen. And yet there he stood, hands desperately clutching his shirt as more and more blood pooled around him. He had done this. And now he was going to pay for it.

At least the voice had finally left him alone...

Hinata shook his head, clutching his shirt tighter in his hands. No, he could do it. He could make it out of this alive. He was smart. It was just like the voice had said, he was the reason why they had caught Hanamura in this first place. Still shaking like a leaf, Hinata rose to his feet properly taking in the scene before him.

His mind went into overdrive as he tried to recall everything the voice had been telling him to do in order to get away with this. He looked down at himself, taking note of the blood spattering his shirt. Hinata curled his lips in a grimace at the sight. Ok that would be the first thing he needed to take care of, and as he glanced down at the clock on his ID, he knew it needed to be quick.

He looked around thinking about what he could possibly do to get the blood off of his shirt. However as his eyes fell on Souda's limp form once more, an idea popped into his head. Souda said he had brought him a swim suit to wear. That meant if he changed into that and wet his hair a bit, it would make sense as to why he wouldn't be wearing a shirt.

He made his way towards the body, only to pause for a moment. That's right. If he got too close his shoes could accidentally get some blood on them. With a small grimace of disgust, Hinata stepped back and pulled off his socks and shoes tossing them a ways from the red puddle. Now in his bare feet, he moved closer to his now murdered friend.

He had to do a bit of digging to find the suit. Thankfully it was in one of the many pockets away from where Souda was wearing his own swimsuit, so Hinata was safe in that regard. Drawing back, he tried to ignore the blood on his feet, leaving footprints as he went. It seemed he would have to take care of those as well.

Making his way into the small shower room to the side, Hinata stripped down shivering as the surprisingly cold air of the beach house hit him. He stared down at the swimsuit held tightly in his hands for a moment. Was he really about to do this? Well it wasn't as though he had any other option other than to just hand himself over to the others. He flinched at the thought. What would they say if they saw me like this? What would they think? How will they feel if he got away with this? If...

And no the longer Hinata went through the with his plan, the more he began to realize how much room for error he had. Yes he played a major part in the first trial, but so did a few others. Nanami... Komaeda...

The latter in particular was what worried him the most now that he thought about it more. Komaeda was dangerous to him now. Not in the sense that he could _physically_ harm him. No but he could completely destroy his chances at getting away, and then... and then Hinata would die.

He knew the moment that Komaeda revealed his true self a few days ago that he was going to be the death of him.

And yet as Hinata finished up changing, scooping up his shirt and exiting the shower room, he realized he didn't want to be found out. Not just because he didn't want to die, but because he didn't want their opinion of him to change. He didn't want his opinion of him to change.

Komaeda, the only one to stay with him after his panic attack. Komaeda, the first friendly face that he saw on this island. Komaeda, the one who showed him and made Hinata feel welcome.  
Komaeda... the one who tried to get them all killed in the last trial...

Why did he care so highly of his opinion. He hated him!

No, that wasn't quite right...

Whatever Hinata felt for the white haired boy, it certainly wasn't hate. Fear perhaps? That seemed reasonable. I mean he did go insane and try to kill everyone... Though I suppose Hinata wasn't really in a much better position as he reentered the main room, faced with Souda's corpse once more. At least Komaeda never actually killed anyone...

Hinata let out a sigh of frustration as he looked at the time once more. He really needed to get as far from the beach as he could be long, or else he's going to have a lot of explaining to do once the girls arrive.

He finished up destroying any trace of his existence within the beach house by using some of the water bottles to wipe up the foot prints. Thankfully it only required him using 1 bottle so when he threw it away, it wasn't too suspicious. Hinata then exited the beach house and made his way towards the water. He was originally going to use the bottles of water the wet his hair, but thought better of it. After he was sufficiently dampened, he started back towards the path to the diner. He had already made sure to wipe away his tracks heading down to the beach. So the only ones present in the sand were from the beach directly to the path.

As soon as his feet hit the asphalt of the diner parking lot did he let a breath escape him. That was close.

He passed by the diner with a smile on his, never once looking inside. If he had, Hinata probably wouldn't have been feeling so sure of himself.

~*~

 _Breathe Hajime, breathe... It's going to be fine, you made sure of it. They found nothing that could incriminate you. You're all good._ It was the mantra he had continued to repeat to himself ever since the group had stepped into the elevator. Unfortunately the mechanical whirring did nothing to calm his nerves.

They entered the trial room, taking up the same spots as last time. The only difference now was the addition of portraits of Hanamura and Souda. Hinata frowned, more at himself then anything. Souda Kazuichi... He had been annoying as hell sure, but he had still tried to be Hinata's friend. _He called you his Soul Friend, and you murdered him..._ Oh way did his mantra need to be interrupted by that!?

No, no he couldn't panic. Not now.

As Hinata took his place at his stand, gripping the wood with his shaking hands, he knew that this was it. This was the trial that would determine whether he, Hinata Hajime, would live or die.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boy, next chapter is sure to be fun right?
> 
> Please let me know if there's anything that needs to be fixed, I absolutely love hearing from you guys! It really makes my day! ^^
> 
> please feel free to ask me any questions here --> http://minteaowo.tumblr.com/ ^w^


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second chapter in a day! Woohoo! Just don't expect this too often though, I just got really into this chapter and couldn't stop until I finished it.
> 
> Please enjoy! ^w^

It had all been going so well for him at first. Some how he had managed to use the same weapon as was displayed in the actual motive. They had also just deciphered that the one with the most incentive from just the motive was Kuzuryuu. Hinata only saw this as an opportunity to further throw suspicion off of himself.

It seemed to be working too as everyone soon seemed to be ganging up on the yakuza. Well everyone sans Pekoyama, Nanami, and Komaeda that is. The fact that Komaeda wasn't jointing in the accusing unnerved Hinata, but he tried not to pay to much attention to this. It was a majority vote, so even if Komaeda said anything, no one was going to believe him. I mean he did try to get everyone else killed, while Hinata, he helped save everyone lives. It made sense that they would trust Hinata over Komaeda.

It seemed to be working though as everyone, minus those previously mentioned, jumped on board and was ready to condemn the poor yakuza. Huh, not really something that Hjnata ever thought would be in the same sentence.

Still, his plan was working. He was going to make it! He was going to-

A slow hollow clap filled the room, silencing everyone immediately. All of their eyes moved to the source of the sound. Even Monokuma, who appeared to have fallen asleep, was now staring at the white haired boy. Hinata could feel his blood run cold.

"That was nice Hinata, really just what I would expect from someone like you!"

His heart was thundering in his chest. Maybe he would just keel over from a heart attack and wouldn't have to suffer through an execution?

"Of course, that is what I would have said if you had done all of this in the name of hope." Komaeda let out a disappointed sigh. "But instead you were merely an imposter, someone simply masquerading as hope!"

He lifted his head, gray-green eyes locking with Hinata's. It wasn't an expression he had ever seen on Komaeda's face before. His eyebrows were furrowed in what appeared to be, annoyance? Frustration? Anger?

"At first I didn't really want to believe that such a thing could be possible. I beloved, no I still believe that all of you would be able to conquer any despair thrown your way. Especially you, Hinata! You and I had so much in common, and yet you were so much better than a piece of garbage like myself. You had talent, actual talent, whatever it might have been." Everyone remained quiet, no daring to interrupt. Hinata cast a quick glance around, taking in the mix of emotions on his classmates' faces. Some showed disbelief, others fear. A couple, like Kuzuryuu, glared at him until he felt like he would melt from the intensity.

Komaeda's laugh drew his attention back to the other boy.

"But, you know what Hinata? I think I figured out what your talent must be." He paused for a moment, but continued when Hinata said nothing. "You must be the Ultimate Imitator! A mere imitation of hope! Isn't that terrific Hinata? Isn't it great that you'll be able to die knowing that you were even below me!?"

"B-but I, I didn't do it!" Hinata screamed, beating his fist against the wood. Desperately he turned to look at the others around him. "Y-you all believe me right!? It wasn't me! It couldn't be me!" He pointed a finger frantically in Kuzuryuu's direction. "It was him! It could only be fucking him! Are you actually going to fucking believe what 'Komaeda' of all people say!? I saved all of your asses from him not even a few days ago!" His ragged breaths echoed off the trial room walls. His hands ached from being bashed against the hard wood. Hinata squeezed his eyes shut. This was it... He was going to die...

The sound of Komaeda chuckling wasn't even enough to draw his head up.

"Did you honestly believe that display was in your best interest Hinata? I thought you were much smarter than that at least." He sighed again. "Such a disappointment to see that a bright hope like Souda's could be extinguished by someone like you."

There was a moment of silence before yet another voice spoke up. One that Hinata had been dreading hearing from since the beginning of this whole mess.

"Hinata, I want to believe you. I want to believe that everything you said was true." Hinata raised his head, as painful as it was to do so. Nanami's soft, kind eyes stared at him. A small frown tugged at the corners of her mouth. "Is what you said true?"

He screwed his eyes shut again, no longer caring if a few tears leaked out. It's not as though his embarrassment would mean much soon.

There was no point in fighting it any more. Komaeda was right. He was disgusting, below human at this point. Murdering one of their friends, trying to put the blame on another, and then yelling his head of in an attempt to justify his lie.

With a shaky, tear-strained voice he confessed, "Yes. Yes, I did it. I murdered Souda."

As much as it was going to kill him to see the looks on their faces, Hinata looked up. His eyes met with Komaeda's. The cocktail of emotions swirling in the other's eyes were enough to make Hinata want to curl into a ball and die. The utter look of sadness, anger, betrayal... And yet Hinata had no idea as to why. Why would Komaeda look at him that way?

Unfortunately the spiky haired teen was drawn out of his thoughts by the obnoxious laughter of Monokuma. The bear leered over them all, a deviously twisted grin on his stuffed face.

"Alright times up! Now go ahead and select which one of your classmates will be the next to be sleeping with the fishes!" And with a joyous glance in Hinata's direction, the bear added, "Although I'm pretty sure this time it's pretty obvious as to who that'll be!"

The button stared back up at Hinata. With a resigned grimace, he reached out and selected. The panels disappeared from beneath their palms, cementing their votes. All the while Monokuma rubbed his paws together gleefully.

"And our winner is... surprise, surprise, none other than Hinata Hajime!" The bear practically winked at him. "Aww and you even voted for yourself huh? How selfless of you!"

Hinata balled his hands up into fists, otherwise he doubted he could keep them from shaking.

This was it... This was the end...

\---

Scratch de Hinata!

Hinata closed his eyes as he felt the chain wrapping around his neck. It pulled him backwards, rocketing down the corridor. He felt the rough concrete scraping and biting at any revealed piece of skin on his back.

Hinata's mind was blank all the while, fear causing him to be incapable of thought.

He felt himself then being lifted up and dropped onto what appeared to be a huge piece of printer paper. Even though he didn't try to move, more chains appeared and held him in place. Now all he could do was stare up into the bright floodlights. He winced as he felt the paper beginning to move now.

The sounds of an unknown machine echoed in his ear. He could hear various part and mechanisms firing off as they worked tirelessly to bring the paper closer. H looked up to see the lights disappearing, a dark cavern stretching out behind him.

The printing process was horrendously painful. Hinata was rather surprised that he wasn't already dead from having his entire body seemingly flattened onto the sheet. His eyes burned as well, seeing as he had been printed with his eyes open. How lucky for him.

The sounds of mechanical whirring reached his ears and he struggled to see what it was. His heart was in his throat as a gigantic Monocoin manifest beside him. At first he was confused, until a sharp pain shot up his leg. He was being scratched away, his mind concluded.

Hinata strained his eyes and managed to catch a glimpse of what seemed o be printed on the card. A lottery ticket design decorated the surface, with his body being the designated area to scratch away.

By now Monokuma had reached his torso. The pain was blinding. This was it. Desperately Hinata tried to cling to his thoughts as he felt them rapidly slipping away from him. He thought of his parents, how he would never see them again. He thought about his classmates, he thought about Nanami and how utterly saddened they had all seemed to be by his confession.

And as the coin began to swipe over his head, Hinata thought about Komaeda. He saw his face, smiling down at him on the beach. Extending his hand to help him up... 'I'm so sorry I failed you, Komaeda.'

With a final swish of the coin, Hinata Hajime was erased from existence.

\---

'How utterly boring. I should have known that someone with such weak resolve would have crumbled so easily...'

A pause.

'No matter, I suppose this is why I tend to always have a plan B.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that execution huh....
> 
> I tied my best to adapt what little info I could find about it in the official fan book with whatever popped into my head at the time. Hopefully it makes sense ^^;
> 
> Also next time we'll be getting some Kamukura, so yah!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A huge thank you to everyone who has left either a comment or kudos on this fic. I really can't thank you all enough! <3

The last thing that he had seen had been the cold, green glow emanating from the pods. He, unlike the rest, had been compliant during the whole ‘ _process’._ Never once had he complained if they handled him too roughly. Never once did he attempt at escaping. No, instead he merely did as he was told, going along with their instructions.

 He knew that this was no longer his fight. He knew that once this was all over, the likelihood of him even seeing or doing anything were slim. So why fight it. That was what he been doing since his creation right? Simply going along with what everyone else around him instructed. Why try and reinvent the wheel after it's already been warped beyond recognition.

 

So he simply lay there and allowed the technicians to hook up wire after wire, and all the while listening to the screams from the others. He tried to tune them out, but with his hands tied down, it was of course to no avail. He was forced to listen to them all.

Well, all accept one that is.

Yes, like himself, that one had remained compliant as well. He had always wondered what exactly was going on in that boy's mind. As simple a mind it had seemed while on their boat ride to the island,  _he_  knew that that was far from the case. 

He continued to ponder this as the pod lid was sealed shut, the sounds of the waking world behind him now. As he felt his eyelids growing weary from the gas now filling the pod, the last thought on his mind was of  _him_. Oh how he so longed to have been able to have had his chance to know him. To know the  _real_  him. Not the version created by her doing. Perhaps, if everything went according to plan he would be able to do just that, albeit in a more indirect way.

 

Yes, that would be nice.  _He_  and Hinata would surely get along just fine. They had previously, so there was no reason to believe that together they couldn't lead everyone towards the future...

Towards true hope...

 

 

When Kamukura opened his eyes, he immediately knew that his plan had failed. Not just because the green light and concrete ceiling were now replaced with bright floodlights, but because he wasn't supposed to have opened his eyes  _at all_. He had never had a plan of his fail before. Sure he had seen countless plans concocted by others go awry, but for him this was new. And yet there was no real enjoyment to be taken from this situation, no excitement that he normally felt when something unexpected happened. Kamukura hadn't the slightest inkling as to why that was, but he felt it had something to do with this situation in particular.

The fact that this particular plan had failed meant that Hinata, had also failed. From his position on the hard floor, Kamukura could see that he was in a room with a very high ceiling. Around him were pools of blood, fresh by the looks of them. Initially he had thought that Hinata had simply been murdered, the better of the two possibilities in his opinion. However he recognized this room as one of the execution rooms that he had created, specifically for Hinata. Which meant that in the end, Hinata's own selfish nature caused him to murder one of his classmates, dooming them all. 

Kamukura let out a sigh as he pushed himself to his feet, grateful that the streams of Hinata's blood hadn't stained his suit. He brushed a strand of hair out of his face, red eyes scanning the room for the exit door. The best thing for him to do was to leave here and find a way to the 2nd island to input the code and-

**_"Upupupu!"_ **

Kamukura stiffened at the sound of that familiar tinny laugh. It was foolish of him to think that that  _thing_  would have left already. He turned to face the way the noise came from, his countenance giving away none of his frustration.

"Enoshima." The black and white stuffed bear bounced back and forth, seemingly unable to keep his excitement contained. However at the mention of that name, he grew still. 

"Surely you didn't wipe your own memories too! It's Mono-kuma!" The bear practically pouted, folding his arms. Kamukura didn't have time for this.

"I will never call you that." He stated flatly, only the tiniest hint of anger edging his words. Still Monokuma persisted, now shifting back to his usual mocking position.

"Aww... I was kind of hoping that you would Izzy~" Kamukura narrowed his eyes. "What? You don't like me calling you that, and yet you still won't respect your headmaster's wishes? Rather hypocritical I must say." Monokuma taunted. 

"Fine then,  _Monokuma_." He relented. It wasn't worth the time nor the effort to argue with a virtual stuffed toy.

The bear hummed in response, obviously pleased with how easily Kamukura gave in. "Finally! You know it would have been rather strange if you were to continue calling me by that name with everyone else around." He laughed. "They might all have suspected you to be the traitor after all!" 

What? Of course Kamukura quickly put together the meaning of Monokuma's words, but what he couldn't understand was the plan behind it. Why would he need to be around all of them? Wouldn't that completely defeat the purpose of the killing game? If he were to tell them everything that had had happened, they wouldn't want to kill one another any longer.

Or, they would all fall into a state of despair so irreversible, even Kamukura doubted his ability to save them. And as he continued to stare into the eyes of the smiling bear before him, the more he felt as though this was the reason behind Mono- no Enoshima's plan. 

The sudden movement of Monokuma brought him back from his mind. 

"Hey! Ya' listening to me?" He stopped waving his paws in front of Kamukura's face, the slight pout once more returning. "Ok good. I honestly thought I was gonna have to get rid of you before you even got a chance to play. Now that wouldn't be much fun huh?" Kamukura refused to dignify that with a response. Instead he began making his way over to the exit door, only to be stopped by another one of Monokuma's laughs. "Ya' know Kamukura... I'm aware of your plans. I know that your Ace's blood is now splattered all over the floor."

He could hear the bear silently walking towards him. "I know about how you created me, about how you implanted me into Naegi's precious little  _'Neo World Program'_." The sound was practically on top of him now. "I know how you desired to kill me for good." Kamukura remained still as the presence over him receded a bit. "And to think this entire time, I believed we were friends..."

"I was never your friend. I was merely a puppet, and I simply allowed myself to be controlled by you rather than those who created me." He clenched his fist, now turning to face the bear. To any other person it might seem almost comical, watching a sharply dressed man arguing with a stuffed toy. To Kamukura, it was anything but comical. He could only conclude that somehow Enoshima had seen his memories. If that were the case, she probably also had more capabilities than originally granted to a moderator. It also meant that even if Kamukura were to get to the 2nd island, the likelihood of the password remaining unchanged was minuscule. He, like everyone else, was now trapped within the confines of his creation. 

Were his creators sure they hadn't given him the 78th class's version of Ultimate Luck? Because he was well aware that his plan had failed, he just hadn't realized how  _spectacularly_  it had failed. 

Monokuma waved a paw nonchalantly. "Whatever, I'm sure you've already figured out how badly you fucked up here, and that whatever other plan you might have had is also going to fail." The bear smirked up at him, now firmly placing his paws onto his hips. "'Cause I've got admin privileges now!" He paused, "So how would you like me to introduce you to your new classmates, hmm? I can make it all cool and stuff, or insufferably boring, like you!" The anger in Kamukura's eyes seemed to be enough of an answer as the bear was soon gone, leaving without another word.

Kamukura sighed as he finally allowed his body to relax. He hadn't realized how tense he was through the whole exchange. 

This was horrible. For once he actually longed for his plan to have worked. No matter if it meant it would be boring. No matter if it meant he would never see the light of day again. No matter if it meant he would never see  _his_  face again- 

He paused after that last one.

Komaeda Nagito... The one person who had managed to keep a smile on his face; able to still believe that hope would win in the end. What was he thinking now...? He was so close, just beyond the exit door. 

He would have his chance now. He couldn't- wouldn't mess this up. Not again...

As he heard the end of Monokuma's spiel signalling that he should enter now, Kamukura pushed the metal door open. The dimmer light of the trial room warranted a second for his eyes to adjust. When they did, immediately his gaze fell on him, standing with his back facing Kamukura. He was looking up at the large screen at the back of the trial room, now flickering and buzzing with static. Kamukura could tell that that had been streaming the live feed of Hinata's execution. 

His attention was now drawn away from Komaeda, who he now realized was the only one not looking at him. Everyone else’s eyes were wide, ever changing pools of emotion, switching from shock to curiosity, and some even to fear. Kamukura shifted his gaze now to the person currently walking over to him. His chest tightened.

Nanami. Of course she would be here. That's just how this program was supposed to run. 

Once she was close enough, Nanami stuck out her hand. Her tired and sleepy eyes looking up into his. "I'm Nanami Chiaki, the Ultimate Gamer. It's nice to meet you Kamukura." He nodded and shook her hand as well, careful not to squeeze too hard. He had honestly half expected her to refer to him as Hinata.

After Nanami's introduction, the others began to make their way over to him. One by one they introduced themselves, some shaking his hand, others *cough, Kuzuryuu, cough* stalked by him without a glance. After a few moments, the trial room was now empty, everyone having regrouped in the elevator already.

Everyone except for Kamukura himself, and Komaeda. Throughout the introduction session, he had taken note that the white-haired boy had now taken a seat on the ground, still staring up at the screen. As Kamukura approached him, he could hear inaudible mumbling leaving his mouth. Cautiously, he reached out a hand to touch the other. 

"Are you alright?" He asked softly. Komaeda flinched under his touch, head snapping around so fast Kamukura was surprised he didn't have whiplash. He continued to sit there seemingly lost in thought, only to snap back into reality. The pensive look and mumbling now abandoned, Komaeda smiled up at him. 

"Oh I'm so sorry, you really must forgive trash like me! I seemed to have missed your introduction." He hopped to his feet, brushing himself off before sticking out his left hand. "I'm Komaeda Nagito, the Ultimate Lucky Student!" For a moment Kamukura just stared at the hand. It was his, no decomposing flesh crudely sewn on in desperation. Just his own. Not wanting to seem strange for taking too long, he grabbed it firmly.

"Kamukura Izuru." He wasn't sure what talent Monokuma had introduced him with since he had been caught up in his own head at the time. He would simply leave it as that for now, and would check with the bear later.

Komaeda nodded, smile never faltering. Kamukura couldn't help but be put to ease knowing that Komaeda was here, that he was alive.

And that Kamukura would be given that second chance he could only dream of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again thank you so much for reading, and next time get ready for that one-sided slow build to begin!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for not posting in awhile! School work hit me really hard, but to make it up to you guys I'll be posting two chapters today! Woo!

The elevator ride to the surface was quiet, save for the mechanical whirring of the unseen cables. Despite the ride being fairly short overall, Kamukura was still overcome by a sense of uneasiness and pure exhaustion from the others around him. He knew it was to be expected of course, seeing as they had just lost another two members of their ever dwindling group. With a ding the doors slid open revealing a landscape of sand framed by a starry sky above. However even with the absence of walls to hold the oppressing atmosphere in, the tension could still be cut with a knife.

Komaeda was the first one out of the elevator, his fluffy hair bouncing in the slight breeze. Kamukura, nearest to the entrance at this point, followed after him. The tension in the air slowly began to dissipate, practically non-existent by the time they had all reached the sandy beach.

Out of the corner of his eye, Kamukura caught sight of Komaeda, already going off in the direction of the hotel. Seeing as no one seemed to be trying to stop him, Kamukura also started off in the same direction. Unfortunately for him, it seemed as though he wasn't as lucky as Komaeda was. He didn't even manage to get more than 5 feet away before a loud shout caused him to halt.

"Izuru-chan! Where are you going?" He turned to find that they were all looking at him. One girl, Mioda, was bouncing towards him. As soon as she was close enough she reached forward and grabbed his arm, dragging him back to the rest. Kamukura didn't try to resist, as much as he wanted to.

"What do you mean? I was heading to the hotel." Kamukura said as he looked down at Mioda, who was still hanging onto his suit jacket.

"How'd you know it was that way?" Another voice, Owari, piped up.

"Monokuma informed me of the basic layout of the island." Kamukura glanced around at them all. Most of them seemed more than ready to accept this and head off to bed, but unfortunately not everyone was ready to call it a night just yet.

"Really, and how the hell are we supposed to know if you're lying or not? Doesn't anyone else think it's a little suspicious that he just shows up out of no where and just knows where everything is? I'm calling bullshit." Everyone turned to look at Kuzuryuu, fingered pointed at Kamukura accusingly. Pekoyama stepped up beside him and placed a hand on his shoulder. The yakuza flinched moving away, but still she persisted.

"Perhaps, but he could just be telling the truth." Kuzuryuu muttered something under his breath, something that only Pekoyama seemed to hear as she nodded her head at him. "Regardless I don't think it's worth getting worked up over right now anyways. We should all head back and clear our heads before we start pointing fingers again so soon."

The others nodded, and while Kuzuryuu wasn't fully in agreement, he too relented and began to walk in the direction of the cabins. Kamukura walked towards the rear of the group, watching them all carefully. He watched as Kuzuryuu was walking closer to Pekoyama, their hands occasionally brushing together. How would he react if he were to know that had things gone according to plan, Pekoyama would be dead? Surely he knew about his sister's death by this point, but it was an intriguing thought so he entertained it a bit longer. His gaze shifted as he caught sight of Tanaka and Sonia walking together as well, the latter holding onto one of the hamsters. The same could be said for those two as well. Once more his attention was pulled towards the loud sound of laughter. Owari and Nidai laughing and joking with one another, not having a care in the world. And what about them? Kamukura narrowed his eyes as he thought. There was still no guarantee that they wouldn't have to face a reality similar to one he had originally planned, and-  
He was pulled abruptly from his mind by a tug on his sleeve. Kamukura felt his heart clench for a brief moment.

"Are you alright?" Came the soft and sleepy voice of Nanami. Images of a girl riddled with holes, desperately reaching out to him for help from a pool of her own blood filled his mind. Kamukura shook his head to clear them away.

"Yes I'm fine. Still just trying to figure out why I'm here, and where here is exactly." He lied. Of course Nanami didn't know the difference and nodded her head.

"Oh, that makes sense." She didn't say anything else, but the silence that fell between the two of them wasn't unpleasant. It was actually kind of nice.

\---

They all arrived at the cabins a few short minutes later. Everyone started going their separate ways finally leaving Kamukura all alone on the dock. He started towards the one that still had Hinata's pixilated portrait on the mailbox. He was just about to try the handle when the door swung into the cabin. Monokuma strutted out, brushing past Kamukura only to turn and face him again.

"Ah I see you already figured out which one was going to be yours then huh? Well I just finished setting the place up for you and what not." Monokuma held up a paw as though to keep Kamukura from speaking. "And there's no need to thank me, so sweet dreams and all that jazz!" And as quickly as he had appeared, the bear disappeared leaving Kamukura alone once more. Now with nothing going on, the weight of the day's events crashed down on him. He pushed open the door and made his way inside, already undoing his tie and draping it along with his jacket onto the sofa. Kamukura ran his fingers through his hair as he climbed onto the bed, pulling the covers back and sliding underneath. While he was designed to forgo sleep, he was still able to become exhausted enough to desire it.

Today had been quite eventful, and yet at the same time not a lot had really happened. He wondered why that would be. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that everything around him seemed to be spiraling out of control? That everything that had been set up since his creation was suddenly being scrambled, and he had no way to stop it from happening. He let out a breath.

He felt like a puppet whose strings had just been cut during the middle of a performance. He knew he had never been in control of his own life, and that whenever he did actually try to take charge, something awful always happened. The time most prominent in his mind being his decision to aid Enoshima. Which had ultimately led to the worldwide destruction of society. He knew that something like that couldn't happen here in the simulation, but it still felt odd to now have autonomy and not have to fear the end of the world for acting on it. Besides that weighing in his mind, there was another slightly more pressing matter to take care of.

Komaeda, and more specifically what he was going to do about him. It had been Kamukura's desire to see him once more, but now that it was actually happening, he wasn't sure what to do. A feeling that he absolutely loathed. Not knowing what to do in a given situation drove him crazy.

While he knew that he wanted to get to know Komaeda more, he wasn't sure whether it was more personal interest, or if there was something more behind it. He kind of assumed that it was the latter. But if that really was the case, where had this feeling come from? Certainly it wasn't from when they had been together while in Towa City. He had felt no love for Komaeda, then known as Servant, even though he was certain that the other had been obsessed with him. From the beginning the Servant had made it quite clear that he was willing to offer himself to Kamukura for whatever he needed. He had also made sure that Kamukura knew he had indeed meant 'anything' that he wanted to do, and at the time Kamukura had been more than happy to take advantage of that offer.

He snorted and turned on his side. Ok, if it wasn't that, then when had this started? He automatically ruled out the boat ride to Jabberwock Island as there had been little time to interact, and Komaeda's memories from Towa had been wiped...

He stopped, and lay there unblinking for a moment. The first time they had met, down in that room hidden underneath Hope Peak's grounds. It had been a while since that time, and yet even now Kamukura could feel the spark that he had felt when he touched Komaeda. He had known that the other had felt it too, the look on his face as he reached out for Kamukura, even though he had just been shot. At the time he hadn't really thought much of it, but as time passed he began to recognize what that feeling was. Kamukura had been unnerved by this, having always believed that emotions such as love were beneath him. It was part of the reason as to why he had requested that his memories were wiped along with the rest of the 77th class that first time.

He allowed himself to smile a little bit, thankful to have yet another one of his concerns sorted out. However that feeling was brief as he now realized something else. Now that his plan had failed, he wasn't sure who was going to die and when. In his original plan, he had seen two possibilities when it came to Komaeda. The first was that Hinata was able to keep Komaeda from going off and killing himself. The second was that Komaeda did end up getting himself killed in an attempt to reveal the traitor. Now, Kamukura wasn't sure what might happen.

He breathed out, massaging his temple with his fingers. He knew he needed to stop thinking about things like this right now, but he couldn't help it. As much as he hated to admit it, even to himself, he was scared. Scared of losing Komaeda yet again. Sure he knew that this was a simulation and he wouldn't really be dead, but Enoshima having more power than he had originally planned to give her unnerved him. What if she had made so that whoever did in the game died in real life as well? And as much as Kamukura wished he could just write that off as just something from a crappy anime, it would surely be 'despair inducing' for any survivors.

Originally his plan had been to just learn more about Komaeda and enjoy his time here. He never planned to participate in the trials, and certainly never kill anyone. But now with the fear of Komaeda dying prematurely, Kamukura wasn't so sure if he could get away with doing just that. So he added onto that in his mind; that he would follow his original plan to remain neutral, unless doing so would allow Komaeda to die.

He glanced to his side, staring off at a small writing desk to the far side of the room. In the darkness of the room his eyes caught sight of a small notepad and pen beside it. He had the plan detailed out in his mind, but for some reason writing it out felt as though it would ease his mind more. So he swung his legs onto the floor and made his way over to the desk. He quickly wrote down everything that he planned to do, finally signing the bottom of the page. A contract with himself of sorts. Now that it was in writing, it felt like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. There was a sense finality to doing that, and it comforted him so much that as he settled back into the bed his eyes fell shut almost immediately.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I went back and edited some of the dialogue, specifically Ibuki's since the user FeelingElectric was kind enough to point out to me that it was a little off! I'll also be editing that in the next chapter as well ^^


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So remember that 'eventual smut' tag? Well... ^^

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also just a bit of a warning for a kind of unhealthy relationship between Kamukura and Servant ^^;

Not much had changed in Towa, even without that green-haired she demon running about. It still was bleak and dull, overall rather boring in Kamukura's opinion. It had been sometime since those two girls had assumed control within the city, dutifully going about and freeing the children from those mind controlling devices. However, the city's structure was still in shambles. Buildings were still crumbling or completely demolished. The streets were still filled with debris, the occasional corpse, and Monokumas. The latter of which seemed to still run rampant, even without little Miss Towa's control.

Abruptly, Kamukura came to a halt. He turned his head to see a Monokuma approaching from an alley to his left. The mechanical bear seemed to pause for a moment before letting out an ear piercing laugh and rushing forward. Kamukura remained still waiting until it came within range, rushing forward and piercing through its head with his hand as it did. He steadied himself and used his other hand to push the machine from his arm. Kamukura looked down at the robot with boredom. Their attack patterns really were rather predictable after a while. If a normal, boring, high school girl with a glorified megaphone could figure it out, surely he would pick up on it in an instance.

After that ‘exciting’ encounter, the rest of his trip went rather smoothly. When he finally turned into the alley, the moon was still overhead. Kamukura sighed, knowing that even without any proper way to tell the time, it was still much too early for him to be returning. Usually he was out for much longer than this, but tonight's "business" partner hadn't been able to keep his interest for very long. It was a problem that seemed to be happening more and more recently. No one was able to capture his attention for very long, completely in capable of giving him some sort of release. It frustrated him to no end, as any problem he couldn't immediately solve did. After letting out a deep breath, Kamukura started typing in the code to the secret little bunker before him. With a sharp hiss, the metal door slid open revealing a ladder. Quickly descending, Kamukura now opened the last door and stepped inside of the bunker's main room. As soon as the door closed behind him, movement could be heard coming from another room.

"Kamukura? You're back home early." A voice called out, soon followed by the person it belonged to. With a gloved hand he pushed a snowy lock of hair back behind his ear. "I take it that it didn't go well?"

Kamukura narrowed his eyes at the man before him. "No, it didn't." And after a pause, "And the sarcasm isn't appreciated." The other man grinned brightly at him.

"Ah, so basically they were ‘too boring' for your 'Ultimate Hope'?" The white-haired male asked using air quotes, or what Kamukura assumed to be air quotes since his left hand was unable to be moved. Instead of dignifying that with a proper response Kamukura rolled his eyes.

"We already have one child in this bunker, we don't need another one Servant." It was now the other's turn to roll his eyes, though he still maintained a playfulness about it.

"Alright, alright I'm sorry."

The Servant was his name, or at least what the white-haired man had asked to be called. Kamukura had never really been bothered enough to ask why, and so that's how it remained. Besides it definitely suited him with the way he chose to dress and all. While a black jacket with way too many zippers to be functional, a pair of roll-down boots, and a striped glove may not give off that vibe, the collar he wore religiously about his neck certainly did. Kamukura had actually been intrigued enough to ask as to why, only to be met with a smile and a playful wink. Of course he then figured out the reason later on, and he had to agree that it was rather useful in certain situations.

While Kamukura went about trying to relax himself, the Servant had gone off into another room. The sound of glasses clinking together and boots moving around the tiled floor filtered out into the main room. It wasn't too long before the Servant reappeared once more, this time holding 2 glasses on a tray.

"Here you go 'master'." The Servant presented the tray to Kamukura, purposefully hooding his eyes in an almost seductive manner. Kamukura raised an eyebrow as he glanced up at the Servant. Master? Where the hell did that come from?

"Excuse me?" The Servant continued to flash him a smile.

"What? Have you never had one of my milkshakes before?" He pressed the tray closer. "I'm almost certain that you had one of these just a day or two ago." The Servant tilted his head, the seductive look in his eyes never leaving for a moment. Kamukura narrowed his gaze.

"That's not what I meant and you know it." The Servant turned his head and sighed dejectedly, but still kept the tray pressed close.

"Hmm... Maybe you're right. Or maybe my brain's just not what it used to be! That definitely seems like the issue here. Surely I was in the wrong, since nothing the Ultimate Hope ever does is wrong and-"

"Could you shut up for a second." The room went silent. Kamukura breathed out through his nose in frustration. "I didn't have a very pleasant evening, and I know you're not stupid so you knew that too." He paused to look up at the Servant, who at this point had dropped the whole 'seductive' thing. Now he was just standing there, practically trembling as he allowed every word Kamukura spat back to roll over him. “Are you trying to get me upset?"

There wasn't even a pause before the Servant was nodding his head. "Yes, you seemed upset and you always seem to forget that I'm here for you to take your frustrations out on!"

"Is that what you want me to do? To take out my frustration on you?" Once again the nod was immediate.

"Of course! It's all that I deserve after all! That's the only way a lowly worm like myself could even think about touching you in that way!" All of the Servant's earlier portrayal of suaveness flew out the window as he was now practically drooling, the tray in his hands being tossed to the side. Kamukura narrowed his eyes at the sight of the liquid seeping out onto the floor. "Please! Please, I'll be good! I’ll let you do whatever you want! You know I won't bore you." The silence seemed to stretch on for an eternity, the only sound being the occasional chink of the collar's chain as the Servant shifted his feet. Finally Kamukura was the one who broke the stalemate. The Servant let out a small gasp as the raven-haired male closed the small gap between them, roughly grabbing him by the wrists and shoving him up against the closest wall.

Kamukura could feel Servant's heart beat increase as their chests were now pressed up against one another. He leaned in, ghosting over the other's ear.

"Is the the girl around still?" The Servant shook his head vigorously.

"N-no! She's in her room, wouldn't be able to hear us if she tried!" His voice wavered as he tried his best to keep his nerves from showing. "Of course provided that she doesn't decide to go wandering around the place. If you want I can keep quiet, I know how disgusting it must be to have to put up with not only me but also my-"  
  
"Shut up. I only asked you if she was around. Not for you to give me the laundry list as to why you are such a terrible, disgusting creature." Kamukura said as he reached up and grabbed a handful of the Servant's hair, punctuating each word with a sharp tug. The Servant opened his mouth as if to say something more, but was cut off as Kamukura leaned in and pressed their lips together. He opened his mouth and ran his tongue over the Servant's bottom lip, as though asking for permission to enter. The Servant smiled into the kiss, playfully denying Kamukura access. Not really in the mood to be dealing with the other's stubbornness, he then bit down on his bottom lip instead. Not hard enough to draw blood or any thing like that. The Servant gasped, opening his mouth just wide enough for Kamukura to slip his tongue in. The kiss was heated, full of lust, full of want. There was no love in the kiss, at least not from Kamukura. Perhaps the Servant felt something, although his love for Kamukura always seemed to border on pure obsession.

They pulled back panting for breath, a strand of saliva connected their lips. Kamukura released one of the Servant's hands, shifting them around so that his other hand was now holding them both. He grasped his chin, and then turned it slightly to expose the Servant's neck to him. It stretched out like a blank canvas, waiting and ready to be marked and marred by his mouth.

"Kamukura..." The Servant began, but was cut off once more as Kamukura dipped his head down closer to the other's throat. He placed his tongue just below his jawline, slowly dragging it down towards the shoulder joint. He only paused for a moment as his tongue hit the leather of the collar. With a small smile he dipped his tongue behind the collar, swirling it around for a bit before pulling it back out. The Servant wriggled in pleasure, causing the raven-haired man pleasure of his own. When Kamukura finally made it down the joint he latched onto it, sucking and biting until he sure a sufficient mark had been made. The Servant let out a moan of pleasure. Kamukura was aware that it was the other's sweet spots, and so he began to swipe his tongue over the raw skin. Another low and shameless moan came from the Servant as he began to spread his legs out a bit. Kamukura felt him do this, and seized the opportunity, moving his own leg in between. On instinct the Servant's hips bucked upwards, seeking out any stimulation he could. Kamukura had to grit his teeth to keep from making any noise as he felt the tightening fabric of their pants rubbing together.  
All of a sudden Kamukura pulled away completely, and without him holding the Servant to the wall, he slid down to floor on shaky legs. The raven-haired man bent down low, running his red eyes over the other before him. He was a panting and shaking mess, much too worked up for what they were just doing. He reached out a hand and grasped the chain, giving it a soft tug.

"Come." Kamukura stated, nothing more needed to be said as the Servant quickly got to his feet. He trailed behind Kamukura, leaning his head back just enough for the collar to bite into his neck a bit. When they reached Kamukura's room, the Servant paused. Kamukura looked back at him with a raised eyebrow. "Is something wrong?"

"Why would you want to do it on your bed? Surely you wouldn't want garbage like me touching your sheets!" The Servant said this as though it was the most obvious thing in the world. In response Kamukura took hold of the Servant's jaw once more, staring him in the eyes.

"I can always wash them afterwards." He pushed the door open and half pushed half threw the Servant down onto the bed. The springs, so worn down, gave out a high pitched squeal in protest. Kamukura leaned over the other, reaching out to ghost a hand over his cheek before dipping down to the hem of his shirt. He locked eyes with the Servant as he slipped his hand up and underneath both of his shirts. The Servant sucked in a breath at the feeling of Kamukura's hand moving across his stomach and then the expanse of his chest. With a quick flick of his wrist both the shirts and the jacket hung loosely at his shoulders, only needing a small tug to free himself from them completely. The Servant shivered as Kamukura dipped his head down again, this time starting at his collar bone and slowly trailing his way down, leaving angry red marks in his wake. The Servant bucked up as he felt Kamukura's mouth getting closer and closer to his ever growing arousal. The raven-haired man paused as soon as his tongue reached the lip of the other's pants. He didn't move his mouth away, mere centimeters from his pale and creamy skin. A small whine came from the Servant as though begging him to continue. Kamukura smiled. He of course knew exactly what to do to make the Servant feel amazing. But by that logic, he also knew exactly what to do to drive him insane. The way he took his time to trace his way down the Servant's body only to stop just at his pants was definitely something that was driving him crazy. Of course, he wasn't trying to make the other feel good. Kamukura was doing this to release the tension he couldn't get out earlier. It only needed to make himself feel good, and this was certainly doing the trick.

Now he pulled back, taking a moment to study the body beneath him. The Servant lay sprawled out, his curly white hair puffed out about his head. Some locks of his hair clung to his face with sweat. His mouth was parted, tongue occasionally swiping over his lips as his gray-green eyes stared Kamukura down. The wanting look in his eyes was almost enough reason for Kamukura to drop his resolve and fuck him into the bedsheets then and there. But he didn't. No, that's what the Servant wanted. Instead he continued with his slow and careful inspection, now running his red eyes over the creamy expanse of the Servant's torso. He had what appeared to be abs, though they were so faint it was truly hard to tell. A few freckles and scars marked up his otherwise flawless skin. Kamukura reached out a hand to rub against a scar that ran across his hip bone, stopping once it dipped below his waistband. With a small smile, Kamukura shifted so that he was now straddling the other. The Servant panted harder as their crotches brushed up against each other. He chased the sensation, moving his hips to some sort of an erratic rhythm. Kamukura reciprocated because it felt good as well, easily matching the other's pace. The Servant reached out trying to touch, but Kamukura caught it and pressed it down against his side.

"No touching, understand?" The Servant tried to answer, but a rough grind from Kamukura's hips caused him to moan instead. “If you behave I'll reward you.” He released his grip on the the Servant's wrist now going up to tug off his own clothes. He clambered off of the other, a whine of protest coming as a response. Kamukura quickly removed his tie, suit jacket, shirt, and his pants. He had to bite back a sound as he did this, the fabric rubbing up against his hardness.

That now done he turned his attention back to the Servant. His back was arched as he desperately tried to find some sort of release for the tension in his lower abdomen. Slowly Kamukura unbuttoned the other's pants, dragging them off and purposefully rubbing it up against the Servant's own hardness. A loud moan echoed off the walls and he bucked upwards in desperation. God, was it damn near impossible to not have a power trip when looking at that.

The second that the Servant's pants dropped to the floor, Kamukura jumped back on top of him. He straddled him once more, allowing their lengths to rub against one another. He leaned down, raking his nails over the Servant's chest and earning a pleased moan in response.

"Do you want to continue?" Kamukura asked softly, practically whispering it into the other's ear. The Servant nodded his head vigorously.

"Y-yes! Nggh, please, Kam-Kamukura." Kamukura nodded more to himself as he reached over towards the nightstand near the headboard, the chain still around the Servant's neck chinking as he brushed against it. His hand ran along the top before it curled around what he was looking for. Pulling back, Kamukura set the tube on the bed beside them. He now turned his attention back to the Servant.

"Do you think you'll be able to last long enough to get there?" The Servant smiled, a throaty laugh coming from him.

"Maybe, if you were quicker about it." Kamukura narrowed his eyes a little.

"Perhaps just for that I'll take as long as I want to." He punctuated his words with a grind of his hips, as though to cement this. Of course he could tell he was starting to lose his resolve and didn't plan on taking it so slowly any more. Not for the Servant's benefit, it just so happened that their interests seemed to align on this.

Kamukura pulled his hips away a little bit, leaving just enough room for his hand to reach down to the Servant's boxers. He arched his back into the touch, panting at the sensation. Another loud moan punctured the air as the taut fabric of his checkered underwear was removed, exposing his cock to the much cooler air of the room. Sweat was dripping off them both as Kamukura finally removed his own underwear, settling back down on top of the Servant. The white-haired man pressed his head back into the pillows, all sorts of shameful noises leaving his mouth at this point.

Kamukura began to grind down against the Servant, running his hands up and down the length of his torso. The Servant’s hips instinctively began to move to match the pace, a little erratic at times compared to the more precise one Kamukura was going at. When it seemed that the Servant was getting close, Kamukura slowed the movement down to almost nothing. He looked down at the Servant again, his voice low and rumbling in his chest.

“Are you still certain that you want this?” The Servant’s hips surged forward trying to find some sort of contact.

“Y-yes! God do I want this!”

Kamukura grabbed the tube and squeezed a little bit of the contents into his hands. Casting a glance over at the Servant he could see his eyes staring at him, pupils so blown up it was hard to see his irises now. Without much of a warning, he reached down and began to prepare him. The entire time he watched the Servant press down against his fingers, lustful sounds echoing off of the incredibly thin walls. He honestly kind of hoped that what the Servant said about Monaca being inside her slightly more sound proof room was true. It was no secret that he despised the girl, but this was not really something he wished to subject even her to. After a another minute or so, Kamukura slid his fingers out. He then grabbed the Servant's long legs and draped them over his shoulders. With one more glance in the Servant's direction, he lined up his lengbt and pressed it in. The Servant's body bucked and arched as he tried to press down closer.

"Kamu-Kamukura!" He moaned out as the man on top of him began to rock his hips, setting a slow and controlled pace. Kamukura leaned in close to the other's face, black hair pooling around their bodies as he did. The Servant was panting hard, breath mingling with Kamukura's own. Their eyes locked as the Servant twisted underneath of him.

"K- Izuru!" The Servant called out as his hips rocketed forward.  
Heat erupted against his stomach as the Servant came, his hips jerking momentarily upsetting the pace. The Servant breathed heavily, tears prickling at his eyes. Kamukura could feel himself getting closer, desperation for release causing his pace to quicken. The rickety bed screamed out in protest, but was ultimately ignored.

"Say it again." Kamukura growled into the Servant's ear. It took the other man a moment to realize what he wanted.

"I-Izuru..." He cried out in a shaky voice. He felt himself getting even closer, the heat pooling in his abdomen almost unbearable now.

"Again."

"Izuru!"

"Again."

"I-Izuru!

"Louder."

"Izuru! Izuru! Izuru!"

His hips shot forward as he rode out his climax. The Servant continued to scream his name, louder and louder each time until Kamukura fell forward against him. Their breath mingled together, foreheads pressed firmly against one another. Kamukura pulled out, collapsing onto the bed beside the Servant. The other's chest was rising and falling rapidly, as he turned to face him. Kamukura opened his arms, and allowed the Servant to wriggle close, pressing his face into his chest. Kamukura in turn rested his head on the Servant's head, allowing the scent of him to flood his nose.

"Are you feeling better now?" The Servant asked, voice a little hoarse from yelling out his name just a few minutes ago.

Kamukura nodded, pressing a soft kiss into the other's scalp. "Yes, I am." While he still didn't feel anything resembling love for the Servant, he did promise him a reward after all. And as small as allowing the Servant to cuddle with him seemed allowable after everything else that just happened. That and Kamukura also knew it meant the world to the other.

"Good, just remember that I'll always be here for you to use however you'd like. I am a servant of hope after all." Servant of hope... A question that he never expected to ask popped into his head at that. Kamukura pulled back a bit so that he could look the Servant in the eyes.

"What is your real name?"

Silence stretched out between the two. Finally a soft and nervous chuckle came from the Servant. "W-why would you want to know something like that? There's no need to. I'm just a servant, my name doesn't matter." The other's breathing was quickening, his eyes beginning to swirl. Kamukura opened his mouth to tell him to forget it, when a loud sound cut him off.

'Ding-dong, bing-bong!'

"Good morning everyone!"

Kamukura's eyes popped open, a white-washed wall staring back at him. It took him a second to remember where he was. Right he was still in the simulation. Not in Towa, and certainly not back down in that bunker. He tried to sit up, only to grit his teeth as heat pooled in his abdomen. He stared down in frustration at his groin, hidden beneath the slightly tented sheets. It was another one of those times that he hated the human body. Why did it have to get so worked up over something like a dream? Or well a memory in this case. Yes, that had been memory. He never really had 'dreams' per say since his brain seemed incapable of creating them for some reason. Instead it would pull up memories of his and play them instead.

Knowing that he was going to be getting kind of a late start already, he pushed his legs over the edge of the bed and made his way towards the shower.

\---

After taking a cold shower to alleviate his 'problem', he got dressed in a new suit that he had found inside one of the draws. It looked almost identical to his, so of course he knew that Monokuma had something to do with it. Unfortunately for him, the bear hadn't changed out the underwear, and he was forced to pull on a pair of the dark blue and yellow boxers. Stopping to run a hand through his hair, he then opened up the door and stepped outside.

Kamukura tried his best not to think about the 'dream' he had had the night before. However that seemed to prove to be quite difficult as he heard someone calling out his name.

"Kamukura, good morning!" Kamukura turned to see the Serva- no, 'Komaeda', walking towards him. His hair bouncing with a each step he took until finally he halted next to Kamukura.

"Good morning Komaeda." He replied. The other male smiled brightly.

"Are you heading to breakfast? If so I can show you were it is. But o-only if you want me to of course!" Komaeda asked, reaching to scratch his head nervously. While he of course knew where the restaurant was, he nodded.

"Sure I don't mind." Komaeda nodded before motioning for Kamukura to follow him.

"Alright, it's actually right over there, so I'm sure someone like the Ultimate Analyst would be able to find it without my help!" Kamukura raised an eyebrow, which Komaeda didn't see as he walked a head of him.

Ultimate Analyst? Was that the talent Monokuma had given him? He didn't recall if the bear had mentioned it during his introduction, but maybe he had put it into his profile on the handbook.

But speaking of the black and white bear, as soon as the two of them entered the restaurant, he appeared. Monokuma rushed towards Monomi, punching her and sending her flying across the room. He dusted off his paws, and stood leering over her proudly.

"That's what you get when you go messing with my Monobeasts little sis!"

The pink and white rabbit cried, and yet still managed to seem angry at the same time. "I'm not your little sister!"

Monokuma merely waved her off. "Yeah, yeah whatever you like to think."

From what he could tell Monomi had some how managed to defeat one of the Monobeasts, creatures he had programmed himself to be indestructible. It also meant, if he recalled correctly, that a new island was now available for them to explore. After a few more minutes of listening to the two robots arguing back and forth, Owari stood up abruptly.

“Would you both just shut up already! Some of us are still trying to eat here!”

Seeing as everyone was now distracted by Owari’s outburst, Kamukura saw it as an opportunity to make his way towards the table of food. As he grabbed a plate, his hand brushed up against Komaeda’s, who also seemed to have followed him over. Immediately Komaeda retracted his hand, holding it against himself as though he had just stuck it into an open flame. Kamukura didn't even bat an eye, more inclined to raise an eyebrow in his direction. Before he could ask as to why the other had acted that way, Kamukura felt a tug on his hair. Quickly he whipped around only to find Mioda holding onto a strand, her eyes practically sparkling in excitement.

“So Izuru-chan, Ibuki wanted to know if you wanted to join her and the others and check out the 3rd island! It'll be so much fun, and we can all bond and stuff!” Kamukura turned his head looking back over his shoulder to find that Komaeda had moved over to an empty table near one of the windows. In all honesty he really didn't want to be dragged along by Mioda and the others, he really just wanted to have a little bit of time to adjust to the mess he was now apart of.

“Actually I was planning on checking out the 2nd island first, seeing as I wasn't present when it was first opened to you all.” Mioda seemed to pause for a moment as if considering this.

“Well Ibuki’s sure we can all go there too, if Izuru-chan wants to see it so bad!” Kamukura breathed out through his nose in an attempt to calm himself.

“I was actually planning on going there by myself. So thank you for the offer.” He manually removed her from his hair and turned back to the task of getting himself breakfast. Unfortunately it wasn't even 5 seconds later that Mioda was grabbing at him again.

“Come on Izuru-chan! Ibuki doesn't want you to turn into a party pooper like Fuyuhiko-chan is!” Kamukura could feel himself slowly becoming more and more frustrated at Mioda’s stubborn persistence.

“It's alright Mioda, I was actually planning on heading to the 2nd island myself today. I could show him everything so he isn't completely alone.” Both he and Mioda turned to see Komaeda approaching. Kamukura opened his mouth to say something, but Mioda cut him off.

“Oh well okie dokie then Nagito-chan! Just don't be so weird with him alright!” Komaeda just laughed, placing his still full plate onto the pile with the other dirty plates.

“I'll try my best not to let you all down!” Seemingly pleased by his response, Mioda began moving towards the door following after everyone else who had already left. Just as she made it to the door she turned around and pointed two fingers towards her eyes and then at Komaeda, as if to say she’d be watching him. When Mioda had finally left, Komaeda let out a small breath before turning towards the door as well.

“Where are you going?” Kamukura asked. Komaeda paused his hand on the door. He looked back at Kamukura in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“You just said you were going to be going to the 2nd island with me. And you also haven't eaten anything.”

Komaeda let out a bitter laugh after a moment of silence. “I did eat, and I didn't think you would actually want to spend time with me. I just said that because it was obvious Mioda was bugging you and wouldn't stop.”

“Well it doesn't matter since I'm taking you up on your offer. Now actually try to eat something more than just a piece of toast, and then we can go.” Kamukura stated as he picked up his plate and moved towards the table Komaeda had been sitting at. He waited there patiently for the other to join him, which after a few seconds he did. Komaeda didn't stop by the food table however and just slid into the chair across from Kamukura. He knew from experience that Komaeda wasn't a huge eater, and that he despised things that were sweet for some strange reason. So Kamukura had plenty of experience dealing with this kind of situation. Picking up a piece of cooked pork with his fork, Kamukura held it out in front of Komaeda. When the other looked at him in confusion, Kamukura sighed.

“Eat.” He said simply, pressing the piece closer. Komaeda squirmed a little in his seat. When he didn't make an attempt to eat the meat, Kamukura brought it to his own mouth and ate it instead. Picking up another piece, he tried again.

“Eat.” Once more Komaeda refused, laughing nervously and trying to shift away. And once more Kamukura was forced to eat it himself. After 2 more times, Komaeda finally relented with a sigh.

“Alright.” He leaned forward a bit a pulled the chunk off. Kamukura watched for a second to make sure he didn't spit it out the second he looked away. Thankfully nothing like that happened and Komaeda smiled at him. “Are you happy now?” While he really wasn't happy that Komaeda was purposefully not eating enough, he didn't say this. Instead he nodded and placed his fork down on his plate.

“It's a start I suppose.” He too was done and scraped the excess into a nearby waste bin before placing the plate on the stack. Kamukura turned to find Komaeda already standing with the door open. Kamukura shot him a small smile as he passed. It certainly was a strange way to start off his day, but despite everything clouding his mind and last night’s ‘dream’, Kamukura found himself actually enjoying everything so far. And as he and Komaeda walked in the direction of the 2nd island, he felt that maybe it was even more than he truly deserved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did my ace brain do good? ^^; Probably not, but this was my first time writing smut of any kind, so... 
> 
> Some little details that I didn't really explain too well here:  
> -I like to believe that Kamukura and Komaeda and had met up again after Ultra Despair Girls  
> -Monaca was there with them too, and Komaeda took care of her while Kamukura wanted nothing to do with her  
> -During their time time together Kamukura kind of instinctually grew to knowing how to deal with Komaeda's eating habits. And because of this, he forgot that the Komaeda in the simulation just met him not even 24 hours ago and has no idea what's going on and just doesn't say anything. ^^
> 
> These were just some things that made me laugh or intrigued me so I kind of just put them in there idk ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First I want to thank FeelingElectric for betaing this for me, I really appreciate all of the work that they did to help me edit everything!
> 
> I also want to thank anyone who's been leaving comments or kudos. It means a lot to me to know that people are enjoying reading this as much as I enjoy writing it. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy! ^^

The soft morning breeze tugged at Kamukura’s hair as he and Komaeda made their way towards the second island. He turned to glance at Komaeda as they walked, watching as the wind rustled his hair. He seemed so calm, so at peace. It was almost as though Komaeda believed he really was just on some sort of tropical trip with his classmates, rather than trapped on a deserted island  where everyone was expected to kill one another. And in a way, that sort of annoyed Kamukura.    
  
It had always been a contesting point between the two of them — well between the Servant and himself anyway. Like the Servant, Komaeda’s apparent  lack of self-preservation was unnerving, especially seeing as Kamukura could not seem to get a read on the situation. It had taken him a couple of months to work out the events of his “killing school trip”.  When he was re-programming everything, Kamukura had mapped out all of events. He could predict what he needed to set up as motives for certain individuals to be killed, and ultimately for hope to win out in the end. The scientists that created him had given him Enoshima’s analyst talent, however it had been done unknowingly. They, like everyone else at the time, had  believed she was merely the Ultimate Fashionista, since that is what she had been scouted for. So there had been some…  _ differences _ between their respective versions of the talent. Enoshima had been able to analyze any situation and immediately see the outcome. Kamukura’s version of the talent allowed to not only see the immediate effect, but also things that would not come into effect until years later. It took him sometime to be able to that though, so he usually relied on seeing the instantaneous outcome and dealing with whatever result that brought. This has caused him trouble in the past, but he knew he would be equipped to handle just about any situation thrown his way.

  
So Komaeda being so carefree about everything was only going to make his job a whole lot harder. Kamukura remembered the  _ contract _ he had made earlier.  _ To protect Komaeda, at all costs _ . Even if that meant murder. It was never his intention for any situation, should one arise, to go to that extreme. But, if ever it were unavoidable… He had already made his peace with it.   
  
“Hey Kamukura? Can I ask you something? Sorry if I'm bothering you or anything!” The sound of Komaeda’s voice brought him back into the moment. He realized he had been getting lost in thought quite a bit in the past 24 hours.   
  
“I don't mind.” He replied. Komaeda fidgeted next to him, playing fitfully with his coat sleeve.    
  
“Um, well… I wanted to know why you’re bothering to talk to me. Surely you must’ve wanted to be by yourself. You had told that to Mioda earlier, and I just kind of jumped in and – ” Kamukura cut him off by holding up a hand.    
  
“I want to talk to you because I want to. You may not think so , but I can sense that you are a very interesting person. And even though I just met you yesterday, you've never given me a reason think otherwise,” After a pause, “and my predictions are almost always correct.” Komaeda responded to that with a soft laugh, glancing off towards the ocean spread out underneath of them. They had just made it to the bridge connecting to the second island when Kamukura had answered.    
  
“Ah, well as much as I would never wish to doubt an Ultimate, I think you might have gotten that wrong. If you really knew me, I'm sure you would avoid me like everyone else does,” Komaeda said with a smile. Kamukura snorted. He turned and looked carefully at Komaeda as they walked.  The other boy looked back at him, a strange glint in his eyes. 

 

“Why you'd probably have me tied back up if you knew me even the slightest bit!” He continued. Kamukura’s step faltered at this, and thankfully Komaeda stopped walking as well, turning to face him.    
  
“Tie you up again? Have you been tied up here before?” He anticipated the answer would be yes, but of course that was only if he had predicted everything up to that point correctly.    
  
And not to his surprise at all, Komaeda nodded his head.    
  
“They, Nidai and Souda that is, tied me up in the room where Togami was killed” he smiled at Kamukura. The glint in his eyes made them appear as though his eyes were swirling.    
  
“Why would they do that to you?” Kamukura asked. Again he knew what the answer was probably going to be, but it was something else when it actually came from a real person and not just from his mind.    
  
At this, Komaeda stilled. His smile seemed to turn dark. Eyes swirling and spiraling with mania, a low chuckle rattled his thin frame. The entire time Kamukura remained motionless, transfixed by the display in front of him. He had seen the Servant lose it quite a few times before and knew how to handle to situation. But he had known the Servant, and the Servant likewise knew him. In this moment, he knew Komaeda, and believed what had worked for the Servant would work for him. But Komaeda did not know  _ him, _ so he doubted that anything he did would actually aid in the solution.   
  
“You want to know why? Why they tied me up and left me to rot like the animal I am?” Another laugh “Well that's easy! It's because,  _ I _ tried to kill somebody! Togami, actually.” There was a small break in his expression as he now stared down at the ground almost dejectedly. “But unfortunately I wasn't able to become the stepping stone for hope that I wanted to be.”   
  
“Stepping stone for hope?” Komaeda nodded his head vigorously, a different light now shining in his eyes.   
  
“That’s right! You see I know that I can never be a beacon of hope like you, or the rest of the Ultimates for that matter. So I decided to help them in the only way a worm like myself could.” He paused as though collecting his thoughts, “I decided to give them the push that they needed. Whether I was killed or became the killer didn't matter! I would have outed myself in the trial anyways! All that mattered was that they shone brightly through the despair inside them!” Komaeda stilled, blinking, almost as though he had just returned from an out of body experience. He looked up at Kamukura expectantly, waiting to see what his reply to all of that would be.    
  
Kamukura remained quiet for a moment or two after Komaeda’s hope spiel. He was used to these after having to put up with similar with the Servant for so long. At first Kamukura had been rather bored by his obsession with the concept of hope and despair. To him it had seemed like a meaningless pursuit of thought. But then he really started to listen rather than simply tuning him out. The things he said... they were not things that someone overcome with despair would say. It was as if he was hope shrouded in despair. The concept had intrigued him immensely. That had been one of the reasons that he turned his project of creating the Enoshima AI, and subsequently the killing game, into something that would hopefully end in, well hope. As though to test to see if humans were capable of being both hope and despair at once.    
  
“So you would die if it meant hope would win out in the end?” Kamukura  asked. Komaeda’s face turned serious for a moment as he considered his question.    
  
“Yes, of course I would! If it meant that hope would – ”   
  
“And what if it were all in vain? What if instead your death only caused those around you more despair?” 

 

Komaeda seemed to be genuinely shocked by this. He had a pensive look on his face as he stared into Kamukura’s eyes. The sound of the ocean slapping against the wooden pillars of the bridge filled the long silence.    
  
“Why… Why would my death make them despair? I'm nothing compared to them. I’m nothing  _ to _ them,” he said all this with that same carefree smile “Which is why again I must ask, especially after hearing all of this, why aren't you just leaving me here. Going on about your life here avoiding me like everyone else?”   
  
“And again I'll say it's because I find you interesting. No one that was that insufferably boring would be able to think the way you do. And while I may not agree with your particular way of thinking, I won't discredit you for that.” 

 

Komaeda remained silent, looking up at him with widened eyes.    
  
“Oh, okay.”   
  
Okay? Usually when Kamukura said something like to the Servant, he got more than just,  _ okay _ . Regardless, it might actually have been for the best that that discussion ended there; otherwise they may not have moved from that spot for awhile.    
  
“We should probably start moving if we want to get to the island before the others are done with the third one,” Kamukura stated, already turning to start in the direction of the second island. There was a momentary pause before he heard the sound of Komaeda’s shoes on the wooden planks, indicating that he was coming along.    
  
They came to an unspoken agreement, it seemed, to pass the rest of the time to the island in silence. However much like his walk to the cottages with Nanami, it was not an uncomfortable or awkward silence. The silence that hung in the air around them was not tense, rather it was calm. Refreshing even. As they finally reached their destination Komaeda let out a small breath of air, shoulders slumping as if a weight has been removed. Kamukura raised an eyebrow at the action. Komaeda seemed to notice him do this and smiled a little.    
  
“I was just relieved to be off of that bridge finally. I kind of a have a thing with, heights.” Kamukura nodded. He remembered the Servant mentioning something similar. A fear of planes or something like that. Perhaps that also had contributed to Komaeda’s overall shakiness back on the bridge.   
  
“That's alright.” A pause, “So have you been to this island before? From what you said before it didn't sound like you could do much exploring during that time.” He had not intended for it to be a joke, yet Komaeda laughed.   
  
“Hmm… I suppose you could I was a little  _ tied up  _ at the time! But yes I have been here before that happened. So I know the buildings, I just never got a chance to visit some of them as often as I would have liked to.” Komaeda said with a grin. Kamukura had to physically repress another eye roll and a groan. So he guessed that confirmed his suspicions that Servant’s pension for making terrible puns was a thing even before he became a Remnant. Honestly, he had questioned whether or not it was some side effect meant to cause despair or something.    
  
Komaeda steered them to the right coming off of the bridge, gesturing to what appeared to be a little diner and a deserted parking lot. A little ways beyond that Kamukura spotted a tunnel that he knew led down to the private beach and beach house.    
  
“So this is the diner, but I'm sure you could already see that.” Kamukura nodded, and Komaeda took that as a signal to continue. “There is food and things like that in there, and it seems to restock on its own like at the restaurant.” He began walking again, but stopped when he noticed that Kamukura was not following him.    
  
“What about down there? Through that tunnel?” Kamukura asked. Again while he knew what was down there already, he had to play the part of Clueless New Student Who Had No Idea Where Anything Was, and thus had to question everything. Komaeda paused, nervously reaching up to play with a lock of his hair.    
  
“Oh, that's where Souda was killed…,” Another pause, “by Hinata.” There was something resembling pained expression in Komaeda’s eyes at the mention of his name. Sensing that was not something to ask about so soon after Komaeda’s upset on the bridge, Kamukura nodded in return.    
  
“I can see why you wouldn't want to show me that then.” Komaeda nodded as well, starting again towards the next building.    
  
As they approached the pharmacy, Komaeda explained to him that it was a little small. However Kamukura felt that cramped was a much more accurate description. The aisles upon aisles of medication and other more personal care items took up much of the space inside. It definitely had seemed like it was going to be a little bit bigger while he was reprogramming everything.    
  
Once Kamukura had made his way through enough of the two islands to classify it as having explored the place, he and Komaeda turned and made their way back outside. Once again he allowed  Komaeda to take the lead, watching carefully as he walked beside Kamukura.   
  
Unlike the pharmacy, the structure of the library reached up until the bright blue sky above. Komaeda’s shoulders rolled back, as though he was just relaxed from the sight of the building.    
  
“I take it that you wanted to visit here the most then.” Kamukura said, red eyes roaming over Komaeda’s face. Komaeda laughed softly.   
  
“Hmm… I guess so. When I was in here I had seen a few books that had interested me, but… ha, you already know about all of that.” Kamukura said nothing, now walking ahead of Komaeda up the stairs. He grabbed the broad door handle and gave the door a sharp tug, holding it open for the other. Komaeda, who had just made it to the top of the steps, looked at Kamukura in confusion.    
  
“Is something wrong Komaeda?” Kamukura asked, analyzing the other boy carefully. He had seemed fine just a few moments ago, but now he was tense again. Komaeda snapped out of whatever daze he had been in, laughing shakily and walking through the still open door.    
  
“I'm sorry Kamukura, I just never expected some one like you to do something like that for an insect like me. I thought you surely headed inside already.” Komaeda said, nervously playing with a lock of his hair. Kamukura nodded and followed after him, closing the door and trapping the cooler air inside with them. Kamukura let out a small content sigh as the heat from the outside was removed. As much as he enjoyed his suits and his hair, he could see as too why they would become a hindrance in a place such as this. On their way here he had considered removing his jacket a few times, but had ultimately decided against it. He ran his fingers through his hair, pushing a few loose strands back into place. The library was rather large, just as it had appeared from the outside. Columns of books lined the walls, stretching up towards the high ceiling. It was a rather extensive collection, but of course he had more than likely read every one of them. He ran a hand over the spine of a few books as he walked down a section. Books had always left a bittersweet taste in his mouth. While he believed that knowledge was power, in this written form it only held bad memories for him. Memories of countless hours, days even spent in solitary confinement. Forced to read, and keep reading until his freshly healed head split at the seams. Cocktails of drugs designed to keep him awake longer being pumped into his body. Huge machines, and too many blurred faces pacing over him to count.    
  
“Kamukura? Are you alright?” Kamukura flinched at the hand on his shoulder. On instinct he turned and grabbed a hold of the offending appendage, fully intent on snapping it off. Thankfully Komaeda’s surprised cry kept him from going that far. Kamukura blinked, his eyes beginning to focus as he took in his surroundings again. He was ok. He was in the library on the second island. He was with Komaeda. Whose hand he had almost broken. Immediately he released his grip, flexing his hand at his side. It  tingled, almost as though he was still grasping Komaeda’s. The other retracted his own arm protectively to his chest, rubbing at it for a moment before letting it finally fall to his side. It was his left hand Kamukura noted. At least it was not the worst thing that had ever happened to that particular appendage.   
  
“I’m sorry. I did not intend to hurt you, I was just… caught in my own mind and did not realize it was you,” Kamukura said, his voice soft. He felt an unpleasant sensation sloshing around inside of him as Komaeda looked at the ground, eyes distant, only nodding his head in response. Kamukura was certain he had felt this before, once or twice perhaps. Could it be guilt? If it was, well he certainly did not enjoy the feeling one bit. He looked Komaeda over again, his eyes stopping on a book he had clutched at his side. It was a leather bound book, with shimmering gold lettering running down the spine. The words on it were in English, but of course Kamukura could easily read them.   
  
“Remastered Book of Fairytales?” He asked, voice still soft. Komaeda’s head popped up, cheeks reddening in embarrassment.    
  
“Oh, yes…. Ha, they must seem very childish to someone like you though,” Komaeda murmured nervously playing with his hair again. Kamukura watched him as he used his left hand to fiddle with a lock, wincing in pain as he moved his wrist.   
  
“Perhaps, but I don't mind if you or anyone else chooses to read such things.” Komaeda stopped playing with his hair and let his injured hand drop back down, much to Kamukura’s relief.    
  
“Really? You don't find me strange for liking such things? I was expecting you to make fun of me for it.” Komaeda said with a small forced smile. Kamukura frowned.   
  
“No, I would not,” He stated his voice no longer gentle, but rather firm. He let out a sigh after that, running his hand through his hair once again. “Was there any other book that you wanted to find? Or was that the only one?” He asked. As much as he wanted to leave then and there, he did not want to pressure Komaeda into making a decision by giving him an out. However, Komaeda was clever enough to pick up on the subtext of what Kamukura just said.   
  
“Oh no this is all I wanted. Do you want to go to the last building now? Or perhaps you’ve finally gotten sick of being near me and want to head back?” Kamukura narrowed his eyes. As much as he enjoyed his company, his constant self-deprecation were beginning to grate on his nerves.   
  
“We can leave now, and yes I would like to see the last building,” He paused for a moment before adding, “With you.”    
  
With that being said the two headed towards the doors again, Komaeda still clutching the book of fairytales close to his chest. The walk to the next building was once more in silence. It was tense though, maybe even more so than when they were in the library. It was still a ways to go, and Kamukura still felt rather guilty. Letting out a small breath, he looked over at Komaeda. His eyes fell once more to the book in his arms, and an idea came to him.   
  
“Hey Komaeda, what's your favorite story from that book?” Kamukura asked. Komaeda looked once again surprised at being addressed, blinking a few times as he processed question. Once it had, he chuckled nervously, shifting the book a little in his arms.    
  
“I don't know… You might not know it…” Komaeda said.   
  
Kamukura stopped, placing a hand on Komaeda’s arm to stop him. He let out a small gasp of surprise at the sudden contact. Kamukura let him go.    
  
“Of course I would know it,” He stated flatly in response. Komaeda was silent for a few seconds as though weighing the pros and cons out in his head. Finally with a sort of frustrated breath he spoke.   
  
“I suppose I would have to say  _ Sleeping Beauty _ ,” he paused after this, waiting to see Kamukura’s response. Unfortunately for him, no indication of what Kamukura was thinking could be gleaned from his expression. Seeing no obvious sign of mockery or anything similar, he continued, “It's not just because of the happy ending that I like it though. It reminds of things… things that have happened in my life,  I'd rather not say what they were. I guess the happy ending of it also just… just  makes me think that maybe I too can –, ” Komaeda stopped all of a sudden.    
  
“You can what?” Kamukura asked, but Komaeda just shook his head in reply.    
  
“Sorry, but I don't think I can tell you,” he then mumbled something under his breath. Kamukura did not bother to ask him to repeat it, since he had obviously done so for a reason. Instead he started walking towards the last building, the tension still, if not thicker now, in the air. So once more he tried to clear it away.   
  
“Well, since you told me yours I see it as only far to likewise tell you mine,” Komaeda looked at him with a raised eyebrow. Kamukura chose to ignore the look and continued. “My favorite, if I had to choose, would have to be  _ Rapunzel _ ,” he cast a quick glance in Komaeda’s direction, only to end up turning to look at him as Komaeda tried to hold back his laughter. Kamukura gave him a small smile.    
  
“I would have never guessed  _ that _ one!” Komaeda said with a small giggle. Kamukura gave a soft chuckle, though he returned to his neutral expression after a second or two. “Hmm… I feel as though some of the girls would want to do your hair like Rapunzel from that one movie if they were to ever know about that!”   
  
Kamukura nodded. “Mioda especially,” He paused, considering whether or not to continue. With a breath, he finally did, “though I wouldn't mind if ever you wished to do something like that.” There was a brief moment where he actually genuinely regretted saying that. Regret. Another unfamiliar and loathsome feeling. However Komaeda turned to face him, slowing to a stop. There was this almost awed expression on his face as he looked into Kamukura’s eyes.    
  
“Really? You wouldn't mind, garbage like me touching –, ” Kamukura cut him off by placing a hand on his shoulder.    
  
“Please stop saying that about yourself. You are not garbage, no matter what you may think. It's getting rather annoying to listen to,” then after another soft sigh, “And yes, I wouldn't have any problem in letting you touch my hair. I trust that you wouldn't do anything… strange with it.”    
  
Komaeda smiled at that, nodding his head. “Oh, thank you, Kamukura.”   
  
Kamukura nodded. “Of course. Now let's go to this final building before it gets too late.” He said as glanced up at the sky. They had gotten kind of a late start to the day, yet he hadn't realized they had been out for so long until he saw the sun starting to turn orange as it moved across the sky. Komaeda noticed this as well, as he too began to pick up his pace.    
  
They finally reached it by the time the sun had made it to the horizon. It was the building that Kamukura had been wanting to go to since he had woken up.    
  
The Ancient Ruins.    
  
As he and Komaeda approached, the white-haired boy pointed towards the large metal door, which to anyone else would have seemed rather odd and out of place. But of course to Kamukura who was expecting it, the sight didn't phase him.    
  
“So this is the only place so far that we haven't really been able to explore. You see, that door is locked and password protected. We don't have any code so we haven't been able to get it unlocked just yet.”    
  
Kamukura nodded. He started walking towards the door, while Komaeda remained where he was a couple feet away. As Kamukura approached the keypad and raised a hand as though to start typing in numbers, Komaeda called out to him.   
  
“Um… I’m sorry for once more questioning your ability, but I don’t think you should just put in any old password. There's a machine gun pointed at the pad, and we all figured that whoever entered the wrong password would most likely be killed. I really wouldn't want a hope such as your’s to be extinguished before it even got a chance to shine…” 

 

Kamukura’s hand stilled. By that point he had silently put in all of the numbers, 1-1-0-3-7, and his finger was hovering over the ‘enter’ key. Perhaps he should listen to Komaeda. The likelihood of the original code actually working was slim to none, especially since Enoshima had said it herself. She had control now, complete control. And that she had changed the code already. She could, of course, be lying and he could find that out right here and now, but not without consequences. If it did work, and the simulation ended this soon, there was no guarantee that everyone would not revert back to despair. ThIs and Komaeda’s concern caused him to lower his hand. After a few seconds of inactivity the pad beeped and the imputed numbers were deleted. Kamukura turned to face Komaeda. Komaeda smiled softly at him, appreciative that Kamukura actually took his advice. The black-hair boy gave him a small smile in return.    
  
“Alright, I think we should start heading back,” Kamukura said. Komaeda hummed softly in response.   
  
“Okay, let's go.”    
  


  
  
They made it make to the main island just as the sun had set below the horizon. The moon was already beginning to appear, stars speckling the dark sky above. The others, specifically Mioda, had bombarded them both as soon as they returned. Kamukura found himself once more being dragged along by Mioda, and then promptly given a rundown of what was on the new island. He nodded and tried his best to keep from getting exasperated by Mioda’s relentless bombardment of questions. He attempted to see if he could catch a glimpse of Komaeda, as they had been separated upon arrival. Unfortunately it seemed as though he might have left for his cottage already.    
  
Kamukura remained there for a while longer before he removed himself from the crowded restaurant. Once again no sign of Komaeda outside near the cottages, so he continued into his own and locked the door. Kamukura kicked off his shoes, placing them by the door. He made his way over to the bed, sitting down on it. It had been quite the eventful day once again. However, luckily for him it did not seem as though there was very much to analyze. Which was nice because it meant could get to sleep quicker. Kamukura let out a sigh as he removed his tie and jacket, the lack of energy making him just leave the articles of his clothing messily on the floor. Finally after a long day he rested his head on his pillow and drifted off. Once more, he thought, tomorrow is a new day.   


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> ( and to anyone who is a Hinata fan, well I am sorry in advance ^^;; )


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok so first off, I'd like to apologize for completely disappearing for over a month. I am currently working on the next couple of chapters of not only this fic but also another fic for a completely different fandom that has occupied most of my spare time these past few weeks. (*cough*hamilton*cough*) 
> 
> Also before I forget, I really want to thank FeelingElectric for being such an amazing for beta for this story! uwu

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please mind the tags, this chapter's going to get pretty dark

It had been a few weeks since the project began. Or at least, that's what he had been told countless times by the scientists. He had no way of knowing if they were lying or not. If it really had been a few weeks, or it had been months. The concept of time became slightly abstracted when you spent most of your day going from one drug induced coma to another. Never fully awake or aware of your surroundings. When he had signed up to be apart of this project, he had done it under the false pretense that he could finally receive a talent of his own. Something to make her proud of him. Something to make  _ him _ proud. 

 

Hinata had not been expecting what really occurred in that building, especially not in a place such as Hope’s Peak. A school built on creating the world’s hope, it was unthinkable that such a place would be capable of committing such monstrous crimes.

 

He felt the table he was strapped down to begin to move. A scientist also moved the IV stand filled with a strange cocktail of drugs along with him. He could feel it dripping into his veins, burning up his arm. But he could do nothing to stop it, he could not even call out for help. Finally after what felt like hours of being pushed through bright hallway after bright hallway, they finally turned a corner and came to stop. Hinata knew where they were. He had learned, for the most part, each and every turn from his room to…  _ that  _ room. He hated  _ that _ room, the room with the Chair. 

 

The mechanical doors opened with a hiss, the sound signaling that even more pain was coming. He struggled desperately against the bindings holding him down, but of course to no avail. He had become weak over the course of this process, and the IV containing that drug was still attached to him. He heard one of the scientists going about unstrapping his legs as they wheeled him up to the Chair. They had angled the table in such a way that he could clearly see it out of the corner of his eye. Sweat began beading down his forehead as the scientist’s hands moved up to undo his arms. He felt another take out the IV, a pressure suddenly removed from his arm. His heart rate slowly began to rise with the removal of whatever drug had been keeping him from panicking. He tried to move himself out of the reach of the many hands trying to grab him. He was unsuccessful though, and soon found himself forced into that accursed chair. He shivered, as they had removed all of his clothes save his boxers and a thin robe prior to bringing him here. Hinata's breath came in drawn out puffs, shaking his gaunt frame. They fed him very little, just enough to keep him alive, but never enough to actually function. Hinata was completely reliant on them for every aspect of his care. And as much as he hated it, there was nothing he could do. He knew he could not fight back because he was too weak, and on top of it they would probably let him starve until he learned. Why, oh why had he ever agreed to come to this place? 

 

Hinata sucked in a sharp breath, his bare shoulder blades pressing into the metal chair. Two cold and smooth bulbs were placed on either side of his head, just at his temples. He squeezed his eyes closed, trembled and shook as the straps that held down his hands, legs, head, and chest were tightened. Hinata could hear his ragged breaths in his ear as his panic rose. He felt little sticky pads being placed around his body, followed by the rapid beep from the heart rate monitor. He tried to focus on the constantly changing noise, screwing his eyes shut even more. His concentration was thrown off as he felt a bit of leather being pressed to his lips. He stubbornly kept his mouth closed, narrowing his eyes at the scientist. It was all he could do in defiance of them anymore. Brief flashes of his fiery personality that showed through every so often. The scientists, however, were never too pleased by these displays. This one in particular was easily riled up by such behavior. The scientist and placed his hand over Hinata’s nose. The sudden lack of oxygen caused him to open his mouth. He could taste the bitter leather as it was shoved inside. Another strap, practically a muzzle, wrapped around his head, keeping the leather between his jaws. The strap was there to keep him from biting his tongue, whether it was done unintentionally or not. Tears stung his eyes as he cried openly, sounds muffled by the straps. Finally the scientist he had been dreading to see the most appeared before him. 

 

She was a small women, maybe 5’3” at most. She wore her dark hair back in a ponytail, always done up high with absolutely no loose ends flying about. Her outfits were also always very pristine and neat, showing no sign of wear and tear at all. At first glance she seemed like she could have been anyone that you would see walking down the street. Perhaps a little cold at first, but becoming much kinder after getting know her a bit. Well, as it turned out the saying, “ _ never judge a book by its cover” _ couldn't hold more truth than with this woman. 

 

She approached the chair, and subsequently Hinata, with the same slow and methodical movements she applied to every aspect of her life. She was a calculated woman, and did nothing without planning it all out first. Knowing this, it made Hinata’s stomach turn that someone could be cruel enough to plan out the sessions that they went through. To actually look down and think, “ _ Yes, this is something that I am going to do to a 17 year old. _ ”

 

His eyes were wide with absolute terror, watching as she moved a cart filled with all sorts of instruments towards her. She peered into his face, a small smile on her lips. His back was now sticky from the sweat that rolled down it, his movements becoming increasingly frantic as he knew what was coming next. Her smile remained as she continued to observe him, slowly raising her right hand. Hinata froze for a moment before redoubling his struggle to escape. Terrified noises escaped his mouth as he tried to yell out, tried to tell them to stop. To let him go home. He didn't want this anymore. He wanted to go home. 

 

The woman’s hand dropped signaling to the other behind her to start.

 

The first shock was always objectively the worst one. He screamed into the leather, practically biting through the worn out material. Just about every session he was given a new one to use as they became worn out so easily. The electricity surged through his body causing it to jolt and twitch without his control. Hinata felt as though he was trapped, unable to escape from the pain in that moment. A dark film covered his eyes as he momentarily blacked out, only to return to conscious. He expected them to shut off the machine when he passed out, but instead they only seemed to up the voltage. This torture went on for a minute or two, the only sounds heard in the room were Hinata’s screams and desperate, agonized cries. The machine finally started to quiet down and he felt the electricity rolling off of him. Hinata was a panting and shaking mess. His hair clung to the sides of his face with sweat and tears, even the strange strand that always seemed to stick up on his head was being pressed down. Occasionally his hand twitched, or his leg spasmed. He stared off into the distance, unable to focus on any one thing at a time. The woman gave him a moment to catch his breath before reaching over to the cart. Hinata’s heart was in his throat as his gaze shifted to where her hands ghosted over a few metal tools. Most of them looked like some sort of modified medical equipment. Horribly demented medical equipment. However instead of any of those, she held up a laminated card and pressed it close to his face. A few more scientists came forward and unbuckled the muzzle. Hinata moved his jaw, now tender from biting down on the leather. He had learned to remain silent now, knowing that he would be shocked again. With or without the leather strap in his mouth. 

 

“Who is this?” She asked, her voice much too calm and collected for a situation like this. The card in question, had a picture of himself. The picture was of him on the day he left for the Academy. He looked so happy then, eyes bright and cheerful, smile on his lips and shining in his eyes. He had been hopeful, regardless of whether he was in the main course or not. He had just been happy to attend in the first place. Of course this later on changed, but the picture still was enough to make him want to die then and there from shame.

 

She asked him again. “Who is this?”

 

“It's a p-picture of m-me,” he replied, voice hoarse and shaky from screaming. He closed his eyes and grit his teeth, knowing that he had answered incorrectly. A dark look crossed over her face and she moved back in her chair, signaling for the muzzle to be replaced. He kept his eyes closed, pressing into the sharp bite of the metal against his skin, desperate for any distraction from the pain he was about to endur. With another motion from her hand, the chair surged to life. Hinata screamed out again. While the electricity still ran through him, she resumed her discussion.

 

“No, this is a picture of Hinata Hajime. You are not Hinata Hajime,” there was a pause before she leaned in closer to him, listening to his screams of pain with a smile on her face. “You are Kamukura Izuru.” 

 

The electricity was shut off abruptly, making him feel as though he had just fallen 100 feet only to land on the sidewalk below. He tried shaking his head, feeling the muzzle being removed again. 

 

“But... but I know I'm Hajime! I don't know who Kamukura is!”

 

He shrieked as yet another wave of electricity ran through him. Tears streamed down his face, mixing with his sweat. 

 

“Who is this?” She asked again, voice just as flat and even as the first time.

 

“It's m-me, Hin-Hinata Hajime!” He cried out, sobs causing him to stammer. He knew it was wrong to keep expecting a different result from saying that. He knew what he needed to say in order for it all to stop. Yet he couldn't bring himself to give in. 

 

The voltage was turned up for the next one. He felt his brain practically puddling in his skull.

 

He couldn't hold himself together for much longer, all resolve quickly slipping away. Hinata knew the consequences for his blatant disobedience. But yet again, he couldn't just allow himself to go done without a fight. His mind was fuzzy, blacking out only for him to return to the waking world once more. The woman asked him yet again.

 

“Who is this?”

 

“It's me!” 

 

He felt like his head was going to split open as another shock tore through him.

 

“Who is this?”

 

“I-it's me.”

 

His heart was pounding agonizingly loud in his ears, desperate to escape this torture itself. He was faltering now. His resolve was gone. He just wanted it all to stop. 

 

“Who is this?”

 

“I- I don't know.”

 

Hinata finally broke down. He gave them exactly what they wanted to hear. He tipped his head back and waited for them to undo the straps. However when they all remained where they were, he began to panic again. He looked at the woman, still sitting across from him. She looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to continue. Hinata didn't answer though, not sure as to what she wanted him to say. He didn't want to guess and get electrocuted again. He wanted to give them all the answer that they wanted to hear. After another moment of him not answering, she prompted him with a different question.

 

“Who are you then?”

He blinked, chest still rising and falling rapidly. 

 

“I-I'm Kamukura Izuru....”

 

She frowned again, and Hinata felt his heart drop. She leaned in closer to him, studying him with her sharp green eyes. 

 

“You’re lying.”

 

Hinata screamed now, rocking back and forth desperate to escape. What did they want him to say!? He knew that’s the answer that they wanted to hear, so why are they--

 

His train of thought as cut off by the sound of yet another cart being rolled up to him. On the cart was a board along with a small bucket. He couldn't see the contents, but he prayed that it was only water. Hinata had no idea as to why they had brought this out though. He had never seen them use it before, but he bet it was not going to be anything good. 

 

A few scientists came forward and started setting up the board on a table, angling it slightly. The woman in front him, leaned to the side. He could now see the entire process in full.

 

“It seems that we still have some work to do today. You’ve been making too much progress, and now I think you’re ready for the Board.” His eyes widened as two scientists came from behind the chair and reached out for him. He tried squirm away, screaming and crying out. Now that he no longer had the leather in his mouth, his cries echoed around the room.

 

“Shut up!” Immediately he stopped as he felt pain explode through his face. One of the scientists had punched him in his jaw. He still cried, tasting blood. The scientist who had punched him was suddenly torn away though, a look of terror in his eyes. He was screaming at the captors that he hadn't meant to do that. That he had only meant to slap him. The doors opposite to the one Hinata had entered opened and closed with a thud. None of the other scientists had faltered in their work as their colleague was hauled off. The straps fell away from his body, and he was grabbed by a pair of strong hands. He couldn't move on his own, body still much to jittery from the electricity. However he still tried to push against those hands that moved him towards the wooden board. He was picked up without much hassle, and placed so that he was facing upwards. More straps were now being wrapped around his body, effectively tying his arms to his side. Hinata had been placed where his head was down on an angle. His feet and legs were raised up, a little higher than his head. He could feel the blood in his mouth pooling behind his teeth. He opened his jaws and allowed it all to puddle out. He glanced at a scientist as he did this, trying to see what their reaction would be. They gave him absolutely nothing to work with, just carrying on with their duties. After a sufficient amount had left his mouth, Hinata closed it. It seemed like they had all been waiting for him to finish his gross display for continuing. He heard a liquid being sloshed around in the bucket above him. A cloth was pulled out, still sopping wet. Hinata raised an eyebrow at this. Were they going to clean him up first or something? 

 

The woman stood beside him, picture still on hand. He turned and looked at her, eyebrow still raised. She merely looked down at him and grinned, much look a cat looked at a mouse it had cornered. Hinata's blood ran cold, any thought of that cloth being used to clean his face disappearing. After being electrocuted, he had very little strength to do much of anything. He didn't even bother to struggle or even cry out as the cloth was brought closer. They held it above his face, droplets dripping down on him. 

 

“Start the clock.” The woman said, pointing to a scientist behind her. The cloth was placed down over his face, the liquid, probably water, began to stream into his nose. Sudden fear coursed through his body. What!? Were they going to drown him!? With the Chair, Hinata knew that they would never go far enough to kill him. It was controlled enough, and they also had his heart rate to know how much more he could take. This however, was completely different. There was no control what so ever. He felt as though he was drowning, water flooding his nose and now his mouth as he screamed. He screamed for help until his voice was hoarse and cracked. He felt even more water being poured over the cloth, speeding up the process. He was coughing and sputtering, desperately tugging against his bonds. He was still much too weak however, rough bruises and cuts littering his wrist and calves from the straps. As he was hyperventilating beneath the cloth, the woman had moved closer. He couldn't see her, but he could still hear her shoes above his screams of terror. 

 

“Who are you? And please don't lie this time.” 

 

“I-I don't know…” He whimpered out, shaking his head back and forth in one final attempt to remove the cloth. He cried out as more water was dumped on it, surely his lungs would be filled by now.

 

“No, you do know. Now who are you?”

 

“I-I'm Kamukura I-Izuru!” Hinata shouted out, voice petering off at the end. He was becoming tired and felt himself as he slipped into a brief moment of unconsciousness.

 

“Hmm… I still feel you’re lying.”

 

Hinata could feel anger now mixing with his panic. 

 

“I’M KAMUKURA IZURU!” He screamed. “I’mKamukuraIzuruI’mKamukuraIzuruI’mKamukuraIzuruI’m — ”

 

He silenced as the cloth was torn from his face, a little bit of leftover blood staining the edge. The bright lights of the room flooded his eyes, and caused him to squint. He opened his mouth to begin yelling again, when the woman’s hand clapped down on his face. A shiver ran down his spine as he looked up into her icy eyes. There was nothing there, nothing human at least. But how could there be? Would a normal, sane human be able to even think of torturing a 17 year old boy? The silence hung in the air as the seconds stretched on. He swore he could hear his heart beating rapidly in his chest, that's how silent it was. 

 

“Stop. You are just saying that to get us to let you go. It's worked for you in the past correct? So you expected that if you just screamed out your little brain and gave me the answers I wanted, I would let you go?” She asked, her voice still perfectly even and smooth. Hinata didn't even bother trying to answer. His head hurt, his throat hurt, his entire  _ body _ wanted to die. She frowned and glanced over to one of her colleagues, asking them something. Hinata had started to black out again, and didn't catch what was being said. All he heard was, “something something, the chair, something something, vr.” He instinctively tensed at the mention of the Chair. However the second part was what confused him. VR? As in virtual reality? What on earth they possibly use that for —

 

The board he was on started tilting again, and soon he was laying flat. The table began to move, and at first he thought he was being brought back to the Chair. Much to his surprise, he was instead being taken towards the entrance. Was it over? Was he now going back to his room? It certainly seemed that way, the woman scientist waving to them. 

 

“If as much progress is made in the future as it was today, we’ll be able to use the VR sooner than we had thought. Thank you for your cooperation Kamukura.”

 

_ Kamukura…  _ Why did it now sound right? He had just been saying that name to get them to stop, just as she had said he had be doing.  _ Kamukura Izuru…  _ He repeated it again, the sound of it echoing inside his damaged mind. It was strange though, he felt so adamantly the he was indeed Hinata Hajime. He could not remember anything from before he came to Hope’s Peak. Bits and pieces yes, but it felt like entire years had been ripped away from him. How long has he really been down here in this building again? He had thought that it had been a couple of weeks, but maybe it really has been months. Maybe he wasn't even at Hope’s Peak at all. Wouldn't that be just terrific? To find out that literally everything in his life had been a lie. Even better yet, maybe he was some poor, broken amnesiac, and Hope’s Peak was some strange, fucked up asylum? It would make sense with a name like that. And that his parent’s had just gotten so sick of him calling himself Hinata Hajime, that they threw him in here. 

 

Or perhaps he really was Kamukura Izuru? And somehow experienced trauma and created Hinata Hajime as another personality to handle it? He had seen it in countless movies and read it in books, but surely something like could not happen in real life right? It all sounded so far-fetched, and yet so did the idea of Hope’s Peak torturing its students. 

 

~*~

 

As it turned out, a few months had actually passed. Three to be exact. Again, he could not tell whether the scientist who told him was lying or not, but it certainly seemed like they had not. Another three months had passed, so now he had been there for a grand total of sixth months. It was probably a little more than that, as he had tried to keep count but would often miss days. When the scientists saw what he was doing though, they had removed all marks he had made on his wall. They scrubbed all of the blood off, as that had been his only way of writing anything down. 

 

He now lay on his bed, curled up and facing the now once more pristine wall. He just stared blankly at it, hands clasped together at his chest. He had long since given up trying to repel the invasive words that warped his mind. 24/7 they continued to play the same thing over and over again: “You are Kamukura Izuru, you are Kamukura Izuru. You are not Hinata Hajime, you are not Hinata Hajime.” 

 

It had become quite clear to him that he was  _ not _ in fact Hinata Hajime. The picture that he knew to be over that boy was much too cheerful and full of hope to be him. Hinata’s eyes shone brightly, while his eyes were dull and completely devoid of joy. Of any emotion really. He blinked as he felt his eyes beginning to sting. Not only were their eyes different, but that boy was tan and his skin gave off a healthy glow. His skin was, much like his eyes, dull and unnaturally pale. He could see his veins, practically gray in some areas. The only that they seemed to have in common was their hair, and a faint spattering of freckles on their faces. Of course Hinata’s was much cleaner cut and shorter. His own hair was practically shoulder length now.

 

He heard the door open, and saw a few scientists filing in. They lifted him from the bed, he had become much too weak to do it on his own. There was no longer any struggle, and he just lay there. They rolled him down the hall, the path to the room now ingrained in his mind. The door’s slid open with a hiss, the woman scientist’s voice bouncing out as she ordered the others around. She turned and smiled at him, like how a child looks at their favorite toy. No longer was there any malice in her eyes, and he felt no resentment for her in turn. She had, much like the torture, become just another aspect of his everyday life in this facility. He had long since been broken. No longer even having the strength to cry whenever a shock threatened to rip him apart. They eventually had to stop waterboarding him, which is what he learned the thing with the cloth was called. He no longer cared as the water filled up his lungs. It was only supposed to simulate drowning, but he could have the cloth on his face for so long that it actually became a danger to him. 

 

Recently they had introduced a new method to him. It used the same chair that he had always been so terrified of before. Instead of two metal bulbs on either side of his head, a helmet like device covered his eyes and ears. He had blinked unsure of what was happening. As it turned out, it was designed to simulate a person’s worst nightmares. At first he had seen his friends and his family, bodies sliced up and blood spattered all around them. He wanted to run. But he couldn't. His mind had become so worn out that anything that was put in front of it became his reality. To him, it did not matter if moments before he was in that white room with a bunch of scientists. This world in front of his eyes  _ was  _ his world now. And that his parents really were dead, organs spilling out from wounds. That they were not at their home, enjoying their time without their batshit insane son around. That his friends, everyone he had believed he met at Hope’s Peak, all the same. Torn open, faces cemented in screams of terror. He could name them all too.  _ Souda, Kuzuryuu, Nidai, Sonia, Tsumiki…  _ The list went on until he reached the final two. A guy and a girl. The girl had short, dusty pink hair, and the guy had what should have been snowy-white curls. The viscera had stained it blood red. His world had spun as he tried desperately to recall their names. It felt wrong somehow, that he couldn't remember. He stared into their cold unblinking eyes, feeling his sweat and tears beginning to mix. He was pathetic, getting so worked up of people that he obviously didn't know. He had never had such trouble remember people’s names. So if he didn't remember, clearly they couldn't have been that important to him right?

 

They never used the same simulation twice, and each one grew more horrible and more focused on him as time went on. The most recent one he had experienced was of himself being dropped in line with a bunch of insect like creatures. The scene was reminiscent of an old game he used to play. Hinata couldn't recall the name, but he felt like it was something that he should know. 

 

He looked around and the creatures. At first, Hinata had thought that they were all going to converge and devour him alive. Instead they remained where they were. He was confused as he heard a low rumbling sound filling the room, echoing off the walls. Finally a huge tank burst through the wall as though it were made of tissue paper and not solid concrete. He tried to move but found that he couldn't for some reason. It felt like invisible hands were keeping him in place. A loud boom brought his attention back to the tank in front of him. One of the insects had been hit, splattering against the wall behind him. Sweat poured down his face, as the tank slowly moved down the line. Finally, it stopped when it got to him. He screwed his eyes shut, tensing up in preparation for the end. He wasn't sure if he was scared of the oncoming pain, or death. Probably the pain, as death in this situation would be welcomed. The where a loud boom, but no pain ripped through his body. He felt something spatter and hit his face though. It felt, wet and warm. Slowly he opened his eyes, only to feel like he was going to be sick at the sight in front him. The white-haired boy still stood in front of him, his arms spread protectively. He always appeared in these simulations. And usually, like now, always ended up dying trying to save him. A huge hole was torn through his middle. He couldn't get a look at the white-haired boy’s face. He tried to reach out to him, but the simulation began to fade before his eyes. 

 

Being forced to watch those whom you care so deeply for being torn apart, stabbed, blown up, choked to death, choking them to death, it started to wash away any and all emotion he had left. He was just a husk of a human being. A husk without even a name. He had yet to fully accept that Kamukura Izuru was his name. Even after having some of his family and friends calling out to him, using that name. But whenever that white-haired boy said it, something inside his mind seemed to snap into place. He would always say it so earnestly, that he wanted it to be his name. So that this boy really was talking to him. That he was saying his name as he died in his arms. That he was saying his name as he shot the boy to death. 

 

_ Kamukura Izuru… _ It finally fit. No more questioning it. It was his name, and he had been too blind to see it was true. 

 

He had come out of the simulation and slumped forward. The woman came up to him, and raised his head so they were eye to eye. 

 

“Do you finally know who you are, dear?”

 

He nodded his head, soft and slow. He was so much weaker outside of the simulation, and he hated it. 

 

“Who are you then?” She pressed voice practically a whisper in his ear.

 

“I am, Kamukura Izuru.” There was a sense of finality to his words. This is who he was. No longer hiding behind the name  _ Hinata Hajime. _ He was who he was supposed to be, who he truly was. He  _ was  _ Kamukura Izuru. And no one was going to take that away from him again.

 

~*~

 

Almost a year had passed now. Long gone were the days that he had been sat down in that chair. Long gone were the days of constantly being tortured, long gone were the days where he believed himself to be Hinata Hajime. Now Kamukura spent all of his time locked up in this tiny, dark room, and read. He still had that strange drug cocktail running into him, but no longer was it intolerable. Now he had learned to deal with it. Behind him he heard a door open, followed by the distinct sound of heels on the smooth concrete. 

 

“Kamukura, we’re ready to begin the talent transfer.” He turned to face the woman. His dull green eyes searching her face for any hint that she was lying to him. It had been weeks since that door had last been opened. Food was delivered through a slot on the door, and even the IV was being fed through a wall and into him. He stood slowly, hand hovering over the needle before returning back to his side. The woman smiled at this and came forward, undoing it for him. “Come, we already have everything set up. All we need now is you.” 

 

“Have any of the other subjects made it this far?” He asked, voice flat and devoid of anything resembling human emotion. The woman shook her head.

 

“Unfortunately no. The other two weren't strong enough to make it through. However I can assure you that this procedure will not harm you.” She gave him another smile, one which again he didn't return. “It's the last step before you ascend above us all. Can you believe it? All of these months of work and preparation finally paying off.” She let out a content sigh as they finally rounded a corner and stopped in front of another door. She swiped a keycard over the scanner, then leaned forward and did the same with her eye. The door opened with a hiss. She and Kamukura both entered. He glanced to his left and upwards towards a high windowed off area. He could make out the shapes of different people, all holding clipboards and wearing lab coats and goggles. He continued over to the machine in the middle of the strangely lit room. Green lights shone from every available space and surface available. From the floor all the way up the walls and even to the ceiling. Kamukura climbed into the machine, allowing the scientists to bustle around attaching wire after wire, tube after tube. With a whir the machine came to life, the pod’s lid slowly sliding closed. Suddenly he remembered a person that he hadn't thought of in a while. He can't quite recall his name, but he can sure see him. His white bouncy hair, his brilliant gray-green eyes. And of course his gorgeous smile. He knows that this boy was special to him, he just couldn't figure out  _ why _ . But as a strange gas filled the air in the pod, all thoughts of that boy faded away. Soon he felt all train of thought slip away, until finally his eyes fell shut. Finally he was getting what he had always wanted. He was getting a talent that Komaeda could be proud of.

 

~*~

 

He knew nothing of a Hinata Hajime. He had always been Kamukura Izuru. He knew nothing of a Komaeda Nagito, nor why he refused to leave his mind. He didn't understand why he would see such strange things. Electric chairs, or a waterboard. Strange visions of people he didn't know, and places he didn't recognize being killed and destroyed. Especially that white-haired boy. Why did he always have to show up in every single vision he had. Why? 

 

He  _ hated _ not knowing. It was a new emotion for him.  _ Hate _ . It was a powerful emotion that caused his blood to boil and thoughts of destruction to fill his mind. Kamukura now spent his time thinking of other things that he hated. The small dark room he was in. The leaky pipe that he could hear through the wall. That one scientist who could never get his IV solution correct. 

 

However after a while, Kamukura decided he hated hate. It was boring, since he had very few things that he actually hated. So along with other emotions such as fear, anger, envy, joy, and sadness, he pushed it to the side. He wouldn't want anything that bored him to remain in his life for long. And it seemed that everything became boring eventually. A constant that could be easily predicted and anticipated. 

 

He sat on his bed, the worn out frame creaking under his weight. Something was wrong. He could feel it. The IV stopped pumping, and after a moment of nothing coming through it, he took it out. Kamukura could hear screams and cries coming from the hallway outside his door. He remained as he was, knowing that whatever came through that door could be easily handled. There was a soft click as the door opened. He narrowed his blood red eyes as two figures entered the room. One was carrying a survival knife and covered in blood. The other seemed like she just stepped out of some teen magazine. 

 

“Kamukura-senpai! Oh, my god, I can't believe it's really you!” 

 

Her blue eyes darkened as she got closer and closer. Despite her outward appearance of a bubbly, ditzy high school girl, he could sense something much more sinister lurking behind that smile. It was… interesting. Everyone that he had ever been in contact with, never had any hidden intentions. Or at least none that he hadn't been able to see. But her, this  _ Enoshima Junko _ … She was different. Even as she lay on the ground pressed firmly beneath his shoe. She spoke of things he had never considered before. He was the Ultimate Hope. For the Ultimate Hope to become Ultimate Despair… It was intriguing. As he slowly lifted his foot and removed it from her back, a new feeling took hold of him. It made his heart beat faster, but it wasn't like fear. It was a… a good thing, it seemed. 

 

Could this be, excitement he felt? If so, he wanted more. Much, much more. He liked this feeling, this feeling of not knowing how something was going to end. Something not going the way he predicted it. And much like a drug addict, he chased it, following Enoshima like a trained and obedient dog. Even though Kamukura felt this excitement over and over, he remained ensnared by it. 

 

That is of course until  _ he  _ appeared.  _ Komaeda Nagito _ . The boy he had seen so many times in his visions. Visions he had long since forgot about, written off as imaginary. But now here he stood, alive and breathing, and pointing a gun in Kamukura’s face. Something shifted in inside of his chest, even as he moved forward and removed the gun from his hands. Almost instinctively he placed a hand on Komaeda’s waist. He passed it off as necessary, that it needed to be done in order to get the gun from him. He felt a spark run up his arm, staying with him even after the contact ceased. Kamukura’s chest pounded as he raised the gun, and fired. For a split second, he saw the world around them flash, and they were no longer in the bunker beneath Hope’s Peak. But in a warped black world. He watched as the bullet got closer to his chest. He didn't want him to die. Not anymore. He had seen him die too many times already. Kamukura willed the bullet to not hit anything vital, for him to live, betting on his luck to over power Komaeda’s own. As he watched him fall to the ground, his heart stopped. Why,  _ why _ was he feeling this way? He wanted this feeling, whatever it was to go away. It was infuriating, to hear how fast his heart was beating. 

 

Kamukura had been just fine, going along with Enoshima’s plan to fill the world with despair. His head pounded, something felt like it was pushing against his conscious. What was wrong with him… He looked down as the girl he often saw in the visions was by Komaeda’s side. He wanted to be there too, but he couldn't move. He just stared as Komaeda shifted, reaching a hand out towards him. Kamukura wanted to run forward and grab it before it fell. But why though. His head was pounding, and he needed to leave. No one was watching all too focused on the unconscious boy on the ground. Even Enoshima looked too caught up in it all to notice. He slipped through a door in the back of the room. Kamukura stood there for a few seconds before crumpling to the ground like a bit of paper. He felt weak, and he hated this feeling. 

 

He felt something drop onto his hand. He looked down and narrowed his eyes. Water? But why would water be in here? There's no water pipes or anything. His eyes misted up, and he ran a hand to clear anything away from his eyes. Only more water came away. Kamukura was broken. He had known this would happen eventually now that the drugs keeping him sedated were gone. That had been fine while the only real feeling he had was excitement. This, this wasn't exciting or interesting. This feeling, it hurt.

 

Why, did  _ he  _ have to be real? Why did  _ he  _ have to be there? Why, did he have to be so interesting…

  
Kamukura decided that he needed to know. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm probably on a watchlist somewhere after spending days researching for this chapter....
> 
> Come talk to me here!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After almost a year without updating, I'm back! I can't even begin to say how sorry I am for just dissapeaing, but now I am back and ready to finish this story before I work any of my others. 
> 
> (Also for anyone who wants to know a little more about why I was away for so long I'll be putting that in the end notes, and don't worry it's nothing bad I promise!) 
> 
> Anyways please enjoy the long awaited chapter 8!

Kamukura’s thoughts swirled and spun. Images of death and destruction flashing behind his eyes. He could hear every little sound they made. Screams as he walked past them, desperately reaching for him to save them. To save them from this despair. This despair that _he_ helped cause.  
But he couldn't. He never could to begin with. He was artificial, false hope in the flesh. So Kamukura had learned to turn a blind eye, shutting the rest of the world out. But he had not become selfish. He just needed silence in order to save them. Or at the very least create something to save them. Which was why he had started his project in the first place. The world needed a savior, a true source of hope to follow. One that he was not.  
Still, he couldn't help but feel them around him. Palms on fire as they touched him, and tried to drag Kamukura down with them. The little flames slowly moved up his body, the pain inescapable despite his twisting and turning. Cries of _‘save us!’_ and _‘help us!’_ surrounded him. Kamukura saw the flash drive that contained the program drop to the ground. It was so close, their savior was so close. He reached out, feeling his body starting to melt from the sheer heat of the flames. Skin and bone mixed as he turned into a puddle, hands still firmly grasped around him. Kamukura could feel tears pricking at his eyes. Damn it! He was so close! His fingers were centimeters away from the drive and—  
Kamukura watched as the hand reaching for the drive melted off, dropping to the ground. Useless and limp, incapable of being moved. The shouts and wails slowly faded into the background. The heat and the crackle of the flames was all that was left. He had failed… He failed them all…  
The world was burning, and it was all _his_ fault…  
He wasn't the Ultimate Hope that they wanted, he was just a cheap _imitation_.

  
Kamukura awoke with a start, his heart beating rapidly in his chest. He still felt like he was on fire, the burning sensation running from the top of his head to his toes. It was unbearable and he quickly threw the covers away, desperate for any kind of relief. However it only caused his head to pound from the sudden motion. Kamukura raised a hand to hold his head, wanting nothing more than for the spinning to stop.  
What was happening to him? Was he sick? But how on earth was that even possible? He had made sure to leave the part of the program that controlled illnesses alone. Unless… was this the Despair Disease?  
That was still impossible. Kamukura had only programmed diseases for Owari, Mioda, and Komaeda, each with their own unique abilities and functions. He never programmed a disease for anyone else, so by that logic Kamukura shouldn't have been affected either.  
Kamukura gripped his head tighter. Trying to analyze his current situation was not going to do him any favors.  
Slowly he moved his body towards the edge of the bed. He tried his best to move as carefully as possible, but his head still felt like it was ready to split open. Shakily Kamukura pushed himself to his feet, gripping onto the bedpost for support. He started taking small and calculated steps forward, making his way towards the couch where his clothes were. He already knew that the tie was not going to happen, so he only picked up his undershirt and jacket. Kamukura inspected the jacket, and after a second thought tossed it back beside the tie. His temperature jumped up 5 degrees just by looking at the jacket, nevermind wearing it.  
Kamukura somehow managed to pull the shirt on, and buttoned it up the best he could. Some of the buttons were in the wrong holes, but at that point he no longer cared. The time on the clock showed that he was about 20 minutes late, so worrying about his shirt wasn't going to help.  
He paused by the mirror, briefly running a hand through his hair. It was tangled in some places, damp and sticky with sweat in others. Kamukura wrinkled his nose at the sight. He despised having his hair messy and always prided himself on how well maintained it was. Kamukura tried to tug at the more matted areas, but soon gave up as his hand didn't want to do what his brain was telling it. Fine whatever, it didn't really matter that much. He also knew he was probably going to be in the hospital on the third island before the day was over.

  
When Kamukura stepped outside he noted how no one else was around. The only sound was the occasional slap of the pool water against the concrete walls. On shaky legs, Kamukura moved forward, half walking and half shuffling along. He had to pause every 10 steps, his heart thundering in his chest. It was probably another 20 minutes before he finally made his way to the base of the restaurant stairs. Kamukura groaned, just the thought of having to climb them caused his vision to spin.  
He pulled himself onto the first step, swaying wildly. Kamukura gripped the railing like a lifeline. He climbed another, then another, and finally he was at the top. It took everything in his power to not collapse then and there. His chest hurt, breath coming in short and shallow puffs. Sweat poured down his back, making him gratefully that he hadn't worn the jacket after all.  
He could see that the others were still inside, talking loudly. None of them had noticed him, so as Kamukura pushed open the door they all stopped and stared.  
“Kamukura!” Komaeda called out, his voice laced with concern. Kamukura stumbled forward, Komaeda thankfully getting there in time to steady him. Some of the others also crowded around him, causing the already way too hot air to become even hotter.  
Kamukura tried to move away, to get away from the crowd. His prayers were answered as Tsumiki pushed everyone aside. Kamukura leaned on Komaeda, his head resting on his shoulder. Komaeda stiffened slightly, but didn't pull away. Even with Kamukura blowing his hot breath against his neck.  
Tsumiki, all her previous nervousness aside, firmly placed her hand to Kamukura’s forehead. She pulled away quickly, as though she had touched a hot stove.  
“H-he’s burning up too!” She said, her eyes widening. “B-but he's much warmer t-than the others!”  
_Others_? When Kamukura entered the restaurant, he hadn't seen anyone else that looked sick. He tried to lift his head to see who they might have been, but he just physically couldn't. Komaeda shifted under his weight, wrapping his arm tighter around Kamukura.  
“Do you want to sit down? I could get you a chair so you won't have to be near me. Surely you'd prefer that to being in contact with me while feeling the way you do.” Komaeda asked. Kamukura’s tongue felt just as heavy as the rest of his body.  
_"Yes, I really would like to sit down. It's not because I don't want to be near you though"_.

"God it's so hot in here. Why do I only have black suits to wear?"

Komaeda blinked, clearly taken a back by what Kamukura just said. Which was just great because that meant Kamukura wasn't hearing things and actually just said that.  
“Uh, I'm not really sure what you're talking about...” Komaeda said confusion visible on his face.  
Kamukura opened his mouth, about to tell Komaeda what he actually meant to say, when a loud and obnoxiously familiar laugh filled the restaurant.  
“Upupupu! Well good morning, how's everyone feeling today?”  
Everyone turned and looked in the direction of Monokuma who seemed to still be chuckling to himself.  
“Well is anyone going to answer my question?” The bear asked practically bursting with excitement.  
“Why should we!?” Owari asks through grit teeth. Monokuma visibly deflated at that, staring dejectedly down at the floor.  
“Well you were supposed to say, ‘Oh Monukuma, not all of us feeling well today!’ And then I'd say, ‘Well that's because they’re infected with the Despair Disease!’ And then you'd all gasp and—”  
“Wait Despair Disease!? What the hell is that!?” Kamukura heard a few different voices shout. His head was honestly spinning way too much for any of this. He looked at a nearby chair and now wanted nothing more than to sit down. So he began to move towards it, Komaeda trying to hold onto him and keep him from completely toppling over. Somewhere in the distance he heard the sound of Monokuma talking again followed by a few gasps of alarm. He couldn't make out exactly what was being said, his focus completely on sitting down unharmed.  
Kamukura did make it to the chair only for Monokuma to saunter right up to him, mood seemingly doing a 180 back to being his cheerfully annoying self.  
“Now Kamukura here also has fallen ill with the disease! Such a shame that this had to happen to the new guy…” Monokuma trailed off, pretending to wipe a nonexistent tear from his eye with his paw. “But just like Saionji and Kuzuryuu, Kamukura has his own very special strain of the disease. That being, the Blabbermouth Disease!” The bear exclaimed excitedly rubbing his paws together.  
_Wait what?_  
Kamukura slowly turned his head towards Monokuma. The pounding in his head growing more and more intense. His stomach beginning to churn even more violently as he looked into the bear’s lifeless beady black eye.

 _This isn't good... Damnit Enoshima!_ Kamukura looked around the room, taking trying to take in the situation. In the far corner he could see Kuzuruyuu clinging to Pekoyama as though he was glued to her side. Nearby he heard Saionji saying how much she loved Tsumiki's outfit, and how jealous she was of her.

This was all wrong. Komaeda, Owari, and Mioda were supposed to be the only ones infected by the disease. And then Saionji and Mioda were the ones that were supposed to be be killed by Tsumiki. Once more the Enoshima AI was going above and beyond the realms of her original programming. Even with the divergence thanks to Hinata's weakness, this next trial was supposed to get everything back on track.

Kamukura gripped his head as a wave of pain swept over him. He felt someone grab him as his vision blurred and spun. The last thing he heard before passing out was Komaeda's concerned cry, and Monokuma's sinister cackle.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So recently I've been getting messages on tumblr and also I'm here asking about this fic in particular. My biggest reason for not continuing with it was that I felt my writing has come a long way since I first started on this. However with this fic in particular, I'm very happy to say that after rereading through, it's actually not too far off from how I write now! So with that being said I do plan to finish this one off before I finish off any of my other fics that I had started. Also look forward to biweekly updates hopefully starting on Friday!
> 
> Also thank you to everyone that continued to support this story through its hiatus! Without you guys I actually might have completely forgotten about this <3


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm really going to be trying to keep my updating schedule to Fridays since with school starting up next week, that just seems like it'd be the easiest for me to do.

Kamukura could once again feel the fire coming for him before he could see it. It burned hot and quick, eating up anything in its path to the table that Kamukura found himself strapped to. Sweat from the heat beaded at his brow and soaked through his usually pristine white shirt. He twisted and pulled at the bonds holding him in place, but even with his increased strength they didn’t even budge. He refused to believe that after all of his time spent trying to right his wrongs, it could all, for lack of a better term, go up in smoke so easily. Kamukura twisted his head to the side and saw that he didn’t have too much time before the flames reached his hair, which would be devoured by the fire as quickly as dry straw.

He tried to take a deep breath and steady himself. Unfortunately the bindings around his chest made breathing a near impossible feat. It felt as though heavy stones and been placed upon his chest rather than simple leather straps.

 _Focus. I need to focus._ Kamukura berated himself as he tried to ignore to pain he suddenly felt spreading all throughout his limbs. A small yell escaped him as a particularly nasty shock of pain pierced his side. Kamukura grit his teeth as the fire continued to roar louder and louder, going from the angry buzz of a swarm of hornets, to the ear destroying sound of a jet engine taking off right next to your head.

It was hopeless to even bother concentrating with everything going on around him. This couldn't be it, he just couldn't die, especially not like this!

But then the fire reached his hair, the smell as it danced along almost caused him to retch. Kamukura began to thrash even more violently than before, his normally calm and collected demeanor being thrown to side as he tried to escape. He couldn't die, he couldn't die, **_he couldn't die!_**

Kamukura knew that he had felt fear before, but never had it been for his own life. For as much as he rejected what he was made into by those scientists, after so much time constanly being praised for being a "god amongst mankind", it was understandable that some of it stuck with him. Especially since he normally had the strength, speed, and intellect that people would probably say could only belong to a godly figure.

However almost all at once, the heat began to lessen in intensity.

Shortly after there was the sound of a click as one of the straps was loosened, and then another, and another, until the straps no longer held his body down. Kamukura’s vision began to swim, fading in and out before settling on a place different from the gray and empty one he was just in. White walls now surrounded him, and while this place and the other both shared a monochromatic color palette, the one he was currently in was much more furnished. Kamukura took in the picture frames that hung from the walls and a small table that had a flower pot on top of it. But what captured his attention the most was a chair tucked into the far corner of the room, where a familiar fluffy haired boy sat fast asleep.

What was Komaeda doing here? More importantly where was here? Kamukura tried his best to push past the pounding in his head to find the answer to that last question. After a moment, it came to him. The hospital, they were in the hospital. Kamukura tried to sit up on the bed only to feel a slight pinch in his arm which was soon overshadowed by another wave of sharp pain. He hissed and fell back onto the pillow. Ok clearly he was going to have to continue analyzing the situation from the bed.

Remembering the pinch he had felt in his arm Kamukura turned to look down at his left arm only to find an IV needle taped down there. His eyes followed the small hose up to a bag filled with what he could only guess was a saline solution. Kamukura then looked around the room again, this time in search of clock. Since it was just before 8:30 when he passed out in the restaurant, then… then…

Kamukura blew out a breath. This was just as hopeless as whatever was going on in his fever dream. Sure he wasn’t restrained with fire slowly creeping towards him, but not being able to even sit up without feeling like he was just slammed through five brick walls, or use his analytical talent was just as bad if not worse. He had never felt so helplessly weak in his entire existence. Probably due to the fact that he had been created with a more resilient immune system so he had never had to deal with any of this mess before.

Slowly and carefully as to not pull at the needle in his arm, Kamukura reached underneath his head and began to move his hair away from the nape of his neck. He grit his teeth as pain shot up his arm, but continued to push through knowing that in the end it would be worth it to not have so much heat trapped around his head. He let out a sigh as he moved the last section of hair over the edge of the bed so it now cascaded down and onto the floor. Normally Kamukura would never allow his hair to drag on the ground like that, but it was so tangled and thoroughly soaked with sweat that it didn’t really seem to matter if a few specks of dust got swept up. He was definitely going to have to spend a good couple hours washing it back to its formerly pristine state.

Kamukura laid his head back onto his pillow, listening to the drip, drip, dripping of the IV and the occasional snore that would come from Komaeda’s corner of the room. Which reminded him, why was Komaeda in his room in the first place? Kamukura figured that he was in the hospital because the others had wanted to quarantine the ones with the disease, and Komaeda had been in direct contact with Kamukura. Therefore he knew that at the very least he knew beside Komaeda, Tsumiki was also inside the hospital.

 _What’s going to happen now? Will Tsumiki still be the killer? Will Saionji and Mioda still die? Or will it be someone else? Could I be the next victim?_ Kamukura massaged his temples. Oh how he wished that this pounding headache would go away. Out of all of the symptoms he’s had, that was so far the worst as it stopped him from thinking about something for too long.

A yawn escaped his mouth, and soon after that Kamukura began to slip once more into a drug induced sleep.

 

~*~

“Kamukura? Are you a wake?”

Kamukura blinked, feeling a sting in his eyes as he did so.

“Ah! Oh I’m sorry I didn’t mean to disturb you! I just wanted to know if you were alright.”

Kamukura’s vision began to focus, and soon he was able to see Komaeda, up and awake, kneeling at his bedside. Concern filled his eyes and despite kneeling, he looked capable of leaping away from the bed at a moment’s notice. Kamukura opened his mouth to ask Komaeda to slow down and repeat what he just said, since unfortunately his head was much too fogged to understand.

_“Wait slow down. What did you you just say?”_

“Do you know what kind of flower the one on the table over there is? I bet you don’t, but I do.” Kamukura said his voice lacking any kind of inflection. Komaeda just stood there, unmoving for a few seconds before he reached up and scratched the back of his neck anxiously.

“Oh uh, yeah I guess, I guess I don’t know what kind of flower that is.” he said before briefly glancing over to the purple plant in question. “Uh what kind is it?” he asked.

“Why do hospital’s feel the need to paint all of the walls white? White is such a boring color, and if you’re going to be stuck in the same room for sometimes weeks on end, don’t you think something more exciting would be better?” Kamukura asked once more feeling as though his words were being puppeted by someone else. He looked up at Komaeda, trying to seem as apologetic as possible. This was actually starting to drive Kamukura crazy. Sure he never spoke that much to begin with, but not being able to share what he was thinking with others was infuriating. Thankfully Komaeda didn’t seem to put off by his response.

“Um Kamukura, do you want me to go and get Tsumiki?” he asked.

“I really want you to stay here with me Komaeda.” Kamukura said, his tone once more flat and lifeless.

While not completely off from what he actually wanted, Kamukura definitely wouldn’t blame Komaeda for running out and getting Tsumiki anyways. Except, Komaeda didn’t move towards the door. In fact he was as stiff as stone, stuck staring down at Kamukura with wide eyes. The two of them stayed like that for a moment before a broken smile began to form on Komaeda’s face.

“T-that’s probably just the fever talking! I-I should probably go and get Tsumiki so she can give you something for that!” Komaeda stammered out and began to turn towards the door. Without his control, Kamukura’s arm shot out and grabbed onto Komaeda’s coat. 

"I did this to you all." Kamukura said, a slight edge of desperation bleeding through. He felt the coat move slightly in his grip as Komaeda turned to look back at him.

"What?" 

Komaeda moved closer to the bed and seemed to be trying to search Kamukura's face for any sign that what he had previously said was true. 

"What did you mean when you said that you did this to us all?" Komaeda asked, voice surprisingly firm. Kamukura knew that he wasn't going to give an answer that was remotely close to what Komaeda wanted, and for the first time since he woke he wasn't upset about that. 

"In order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings forty-three times every second." Kamukura stated, staring up at Komaeda with a fevered gaze. The fever was washing over him once more, and suddenly everything around seemed to only be adding to the unbearble heat. Kamukura felt so helplfess, not even able to convey to Komaeda that perhaps he should now go and get someone to help. He tried moving his arm, desperately pointing at the still open door hoping that Komaeda would get the message. However the other boy was still just standing there as if lost within his own mind. 

"I don't want to die like this!" Kamukura suddenly blutrted out, and thankfully it seemed to be what knocked Komaeda out of his daze. He looked up at Kamukura his eyes widened a little. He quickly turned towards the door, and without another word rushed out into the hospital's hallway.

As soon as the door clicked shut, Kamukura stared up at the ceiling breathing hard and fast. What had just happened? Why would he ever say something like...  _that?_ Kamukura tried to raise his hand, but felt it barely move before falling back onto the bed. He wasn't actually going to die... right? In his original program, no one was supposed to die from the diesease, but now with Enoshima running things nothing was off the table. Hell, maybe one of the other two might end up dying at the hands of the disease. 

However as a skull-splitting pain sliced through his head, Kamukura decided that right now there was nothing that he able to do, and he was just going to have to accept that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading, and if you want to see more stuff from me please go and check out my tumblr | minteaowo.tumblr.com
> 
> (also props to anyone who can figure what movie one of Kamukura's lines is from!)


End file.
